


Life After Life

by ofabrasax



Category: Jupiter Ascending (2015)
Genre: Assassination Attempt(s), Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Dubious Consent, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Implied/Referenced Incest, Pseudo-Incest, Sorry Not Sorry, Way Too Many Warnings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-18
Updated: 2015-11-09
Packaged: 2018-03-30 11:21:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 36,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3934930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ofabrasax/pseuds/ofabrasax
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sweet, horrific, and hedonistic Abrasax Family moments. Seraphi's beginning, eccentric behaviors, and penance. Balem's childhood, breakdown, and healing. Why Jupiter instantly loved Caine and the reason she wasn't fazed by the terror of the situation. The love story of Jupiter's parents Aleska/Max. And a terran female will finally accept the undeniable truth "beings must die so we may live". Will try to explain movie and mostly Canon with expansion.  Every detail is important. NR-Not Rated Chapters could be T, M, to WTF? Blushes and hides.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Alcazar: Coming Home

**Author's Note:**

> Virgin Newbie in so many ways. Testing... First ever story. I welcome grammar fixes and criticisms. Suggestions, instructions, and any comments appreciated. My Real Life betas are busy so posting 'as is' unless someone wants to volunteer :) 
> 
> JA was supposed to be a trilogy but the Wachowski siblings had to butcher it into one. I hope I left enough details, of my 700 page story expansion, to avoid what happened to the inspiration. Movie hasn't left my head since I saw it. Finished fanfic in early February. Maybe when I finish posting this it will leave me alone! Semi edited 20 chapters, may have to separate into series?
> 
> Why it isn't incest click for major headcanon spoiler (mobile copy black box & search)Jupiter is a human chimera Real Life reference http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lydia_Fairchild

**"I see a green meadow, on which there is a white coffin. I am afraid that my mother is in it, but I open the lid and, luckily, it is not my mother but me." Drama of the Gifted Child by Alice Miller**

(The Abrasax) Alcazar  
‘I was finally called home. Will Mother finally answer my questions?’ I thought, seeing  the miniature refinery that lay sleeping for eighty thousand years has finally been given a use. It stood out like a white golden marble Temple of Zion yet it was odd that it’s a sphere and no antennas or pyramids that she loved.

I can't bear to disappoint my mother but our last meeting didn’t go so well.  I keep trying even when nothing ever satisfies her. There are rumors saying she refuses to recode, take a ReGenX 700 year extension*, and is now insisting on stopping all the harvests immediately. Plus, Mother has gotten so paranoid that my entourage must stay outside.

 

  


Walking into the building, I am always amazed at Mother’s extravagant flowers that seemed to be growing on the inner circle’s walls. The outer walls of the building protected the new inner green house. Looking up I saw circle upon circle of windows that seemed as sky bubbles letting light in.

Going through the green circular wall another circular wall greeted me as I got further in the building. The one in front of me was black as the richest earth yet shining with stars. The wall behind me that was a flowering green wall from the other side, on this side had the root systems of the plants and there were waterfalls running from top to bottom then forming a surrounding moat which had red water lotus blooming. What marvelous living architecture but Mother always amazes me with her ingenuity.

I cross using the intricate woven tree root bridge and almost smack right into a person with a stealth shield. They disengage it and to my astonishment it is Balem’s Tactical Peace Keeping Officer that I lightheartedly nicked named ‘Red.’  _It_ always looks like a sexy robot with all that red armor and red leather underneath. We have a great relationship and are currently on agreeable terms. My tactic is to make them believe that they are equal to us which usually works.

“My Lady Kalique, as secondary heir to House Abrasax and Commonwealth Entitled Coordinator we require your assistance.” _It_ told me in a grave tone that I didn’t much care for and didn’t understand. Balem is the most prudent among us and it is usually Titus that needs my skills after killing off Entitled heirs by mood enhancement overdose or a little too much physical activity. My little brother is always eager to push life’s limits. I’m confused but don’t let it show.

“I am here to assist in any way that I can. May I come in to speak to Our Queen Mother or is there something I need to know before I go in.” I winked at her waiting for more information.

“I’m not allowed to let anyone in, My Lady.” _It_ winked at me.

I tilted my head like a puppy on purpose to feign curiosity and then out of the blue _it_ asked me, “What is Lady Kalique’s main purpose”

Internally sighing and rolling my eyes at Mother’s silly brainwashing games, I answered, “I was born to be an assistant to God Of Abrasax, to serve the greater-good and the company in that order.  My life is but an extension of God’s will on this universe. As the Planetary Guardian of thousands, I would gladly sacrifice my life and their lives for the greater-good and Our Mother Queen’s Legacy.”

 _It_ flirted with me, “Wow, you were made perfect in every way.”  Back in _its_ normal tone, “We serve the same cause to liberate the higher beings of the universe from the illusion of time that we may achieve peace in our lifetime.” And I saw _it_ sneaking to activate _its_ Faster Than Light (FTL) implant as _it_ put a strand of hair behind _its_ ear.

I heard _its_ voice in my mind, ‘Watcher, a friend for peace has hacked the network that you and I may speak freely. Please respond to acknowledge.’

‘Roger,’ I replied giggling internally at the used of old war codes.

‘Do you remember what we discussed six thousand years ago that we should never mention it but that eventually the time would come where the universe would need your help,’ _It_ was using that annoying dire tone again. Oh, these lower beings and their dramas that where usually induced by Mother.

Thinking, I racked my brain for the asinine information this one told me. [Orous explanative]! There could only be two scenarios of which I abhor that can be playing right now. I HATE THEM BOTH!

“I demand to see Our Mother the Queen!” I snap at _it_ because I need in there as soon as possible.

“Most High the Lord of Time commanded that no one shall pass.” _It_ replied.

“Lord of TIME!” I busted out laughing. ‘Really Mother now you’ve gone too far, not that it has stopped you before... And the funniest thing is that my dear brother will actually believe it.’

“I have the _right_ to see MY MOTHER when I need her. And I NEED her now!” I gave _it_ a dirty snobby stare.

“No” it said.

“How DARE _you_ say NO to _ME_! ASK _HER_!” I fake fought with _it_ since Mother loves a show.

 _It_ touched _its_ FTL and moved aside to finally let me through.

As I walked down the ramp, it was a great and vast sphere like room mechanical and void of life other than the twelve guards surrounding the perimeter. In the center was a liquid sphere floating inside Mother and Balem were embraced. Inside I shook my head 'if only everyone knew that what seems as the most powerful psychotic being is the most gentle empathetic one of all and the Queen the one who pretends to be the helper of all is the one who betrays them all. I'm so tired of these games, Mother.' I involuntarily sigh in relief that they are still clothed. And was he wearing black? THE AEON angel GOD INCARNATE was wearing black?! Brother must have done something really awful to be in black.

That’s when I look down to see his useless spiritual guide with _its_ usual pretend emotionless robotic face.  The dark skin one with the black hood yet white painted face and no matter what value he places on _it_ , I will ALWAYS HATE _IT_. The less-than-a-worm dares to look me in the eye.

‘You are the only one who can say what needs to be said.’ _It_ says it like an android over the hacked connection.

‘Oh no. no. NO! I’m not getting between Mother’s Play Thing and Mother. I haven’t forgotten the last time I tried that. I still have the bruises to remember that lesson. Also, the lesson that I’m her number two thing and not her number one.’ I retorted.

Getting caught by the movement at the corner of my eye, it was a grave mistake to look up to see Balem in a daze pushing down the top of Mother’s dress and latching on.  That was odd because he wouldn’t have dared tried that and if he did she would have slapped him for it. No one touches her except for when she would let Titus do that just to enrage Balem. Has my brother and Titus become buddies in my leave of absence? No, I hardly think so since Balem thinks Titus is just an animal fit only to be Mother’s pet since _its_ personality is that of a male animal in heat. My dear brother isn’t as cunning as Mother nor I to realize that Titus isn’t a pet but a weapon of dissociation for the Entitled masses.

I’ve seen enough. There is no need for me to be here. Mother is gouging as usual by showing off the intimacy that she has with the boys that I will never have with her. I know what she is… I know what she does… because I’m afraid that I am just like her. I turn to go when that inadequate advisor floats into the surrounding fermonic (anti-gravity system) surrounding the liquid bubble to yank my brother off Mother.

Balem went into a rage full tantrum I had never experienced in my lifetime like all the anger, sadness, rebellion, and everything rolled into one.  He was choking on both the liquid and those feelings. I couldn’t make out which feeling it was and I’m skilled in discerning moods. He cried like a dying ruminant being attacked by a pack of carnivores. Goo everywhere that splattered as he swings his arms to hit his hooded servant and then grabs the base of the machine holding the liquid bubble to call out for Mother. I run towards him and the hooded-thing dares to yell at me through FTL ‘back.’ Stopping in shock, I don’t know what to do and the room’s presence, the helping A.I. doesn’t know either.

But what was strange is Mother’s inaction. The Drama Queen of the Universe didn’t slap him, nor chastised him, nothing… She didn’t even say the usual nasty things of me instigating his self awareness, of course she never said it that way, or that I was trying to steal him from her to make myself queen. I wouldn't dare. Only wanting a bigger profit share but none of the responsibility that comes with it, I don't want to be queen or primary heir.

Carelessly floating Mother had her usual ‘I won’ smirk on her face.  Yet she wouldn’t have these many guards since, contrary to popular belief, she was a private person.

While Balem was still screaming his little heart out as two other servants join the hooded-dark-one to medically knock him out, sometimes I wonder who’s the oldest. I dare to look into my mother’s eyes. The rage doesn’t come and I feel dread as if at any moment something awful will be happening.  I brace myself but nothing comes. The silence is deafening while the worthless dark one asks me to come; of course through FTL because _it_ wouldn’t dare order me about.

 _It_ gave me the medipen showing me that dreamless sleep was induced. I gave it the look of ‘Why would I care?’ and then asked through FTL ‘what is wrong with Mother’

While the servants cleaned him up and re clothed him in something more of his usual angel like self, _it_ said out loud, “Our Queen has decided to ascend to the next lifetime”

Well that’s the answer I get for asking a spiritual guide thing. I stand to go to ask Red and the thing isn’t satisfied. “Please stay, Our Master trusts you.” _it_ had the tenacity to say that out loud instead of FTL.

Still trying to stay detached, I said through FTL ‘I need to speak to red’

Red answers ‘Yes, My Lady.’

I ask, ‘both or last.’

‘Last, my lady,’ red replied.

Like watching one of mother’s dramatic manipulative make believe accidents, curiosity got the best of me, ‘did the last happened because the wanting of the first?’

Red replying in annoyance, ‘wasn’t there… don’t need to know’

Am I a bad daughter for not feeling anything at all at that moment, I will keep asking myself for as long as I have left. The only thing I regretted was not getting my answers of why she hated me. Why no matter what I did… nothing was good enough for her. Yet anything Titus did and I mean anything, was treated as a gift to the universe. Even with his spots Balem was perfection in her eyes or so she said but how she treated him was a different story. I have never wanted to take Balem’s place. Titus, I’ve sometimes gotten jealous of the attention he receives for playing while Balem and I must work hard for any smidgen of consideration.

I looked up at the one who created me, no she didn’t create me, life through her created me. My nannies where more my mother than she ever was. Yet, why do I still long for her kiss, for her embrace and for her rare approving voice. Not having time for a real soul, if there ever is such a thing, searching, I can now truly do the job I was created to do.

‘Dismiss the guards. They are now under your command,’ the hood-ring-leader graced me with her opinion.

“Everyone out,” and then pointing at her “stay” while all the guards seemed ready to go without hesitation as if this had been planned.

“Are all those Balem’s? If so where are mother’s guards?” I asked knowing who they were but it’s good to feign stupidity.

“The queen’s ship was destroyed with everyone in it,” _It_ said like an old tech android.

“All of them? Who did it?” I couldn’t help myself wanting to know who to thank.

“Only the backup commonwealth board on Orous is left. We don’t know but we are going to blame THAT defiant planet since we razed them back to their Stick Age. Also, her majesty held back years of reports to the main board so we can shift the timeline to our advantage.” _It_ laughed at _its_ stick instead of Stone Age joke.

“Then WHY didn’t you _leave her_ there?”

“We aren’t responsible for that destruction and Our Master needs her. We will say they sent us the body to mock us so we can rally the commonwealth to help us with THAT planet. We are going to mummify the body instead of leaving it so life like. My Lady's task is to help him understand that Our Queen Mother is gone and that he will be better without her. Just like you have grown in her absence, he shall grow too.”

“Your name, I want my original profit share percentage back and a three percent increase.”

“Whatever your majesty wishes to call me…”

“Stop! I will always be Lady Kalique second heir to House Abrasax and nothing more, Ker.”

“It has already been authorized by the board; My Lady’s profit share will be increased at an intermediate pace to its original sum. And slowly a three percent increase will be implemented after The Secretary does the sheave work and as soon as Balem is somewhat stable enough to seal it.” The Ker answered.

I said in a cute childlike voice, “Approved? How long has Mother been… gone? Oh she would disapprove of being mummified and wanted the body safe in a cryonic pod (be put on ice).”

“I am not at liberty to discuss that… My lady must understand that for the living to let go they must see the old wither following tradition and for Our Queen to make it safely to her next body the old one must be destroyed.”

“We all know that she didn't believe in those silly fairy tales. I will not allow it. Balem and Titus will agree with me.”

 “Then my lady’s task will be much harder”

“Have the visible wounds been healed?”

“Yes, ReGenX-E did a marvelous job in repairing cells but it does nothing to bring the spirit-soul back when it doesn’t want to come back. She was poisoned by her own self hatred and murdered by her own shadow. Our highest spirit healers tried to bring her soul back but she refused. Our Queen could have stayed but she chose to ascend and now she is everywhere. Also, she left protocols for all scenarios.”

“There’s no need to convince me Ker. I know how dark my mother’s behavior can be and that’s why I got her angry enough to exile me. Everywhere?! I trust you didn’t say that to Balem." Feeling sorry that I wasn't sorry maybe my forlonging may come after the initial shock has worn off. But then again maybe not. "Of course she’s going to control us from the grave!”

**"What is this thing that builds our dreams yet slips away from us. Who wants to live forever? There's no chance for us, it's all decided for us... Who dares to love forever? oh.. When LOVE MUST DIE! Who is forever anyways?" Who wants to live forever by Queen**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [* abrasaxindustries.com ReGenX 700 year extension](http://www.abrasaxindustries.com)
> 
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> [In Real Life RGX14 at ReGenX Bio.com](http://regenxbio.com/)


	2. Brother Sun Sister Moon

**“No bonds can hold me from your side. Oh my love. They don’t know you can’t leave me. I will stay forever with you my love. Even in death our love goes on. And I can’t love you anymore than I do.” Even in death – Evanescene**

I asked not really wanting to know, “What are dear mother’s protocols”

“I’m not at liberty to divulge that information,” the fake robot replied.

We played twenty questions till I lost my temper. Our Queen Mother’s protocols where written on paper, they were written before I was born, the last update was after Titus was born, that I was only here because he asked for me because he trusted me even thought mother did not. I wanted to know the grey areas but the Ker kept silent.

Ker and I had a heated argument over where to house my brother. Finding a grey area, she wanted to keep Balem on his ship and I wanted him to be in his old room. I really didn’t believe the audacity she had at trying to convince me otherwise. I don’t care that she is a few thousand years older; no one should talk to me that way.

Stepping into his room, the lovely memories almost made me cry of the times he was allowed to visit when mother wasn’t around. He never got rid of anything from his childhood. Every toy, book, and piece of work was still here; organized as if a neat-freak teen and twelve year old fairy tale prince shared this room; Everything in its place yet homey.

Finding an old present he gave me, a chest that needed to be hidden from mother to make her think it belonged to him. It contained dress up clothes that mother didn’t approve. Most where his old clothes that where hiding the ones he created for little me.

I remembered the silly fashion shows we used to put on for ourselves, the funny body bending stretching fighting in the air exercises, and how he used to braid my hair and I used to braid his until mother found out and cut his hair off. No. No. I shall think only of good memories.

Noticing an odd object on his huge non fermonic bed, not because the technology wasn’t there but because his nursemaid believed all beings should be grounded, I saw that it had mother’s seal on it.  I touched it and the box called for Balem’s seal.

Balem’s hooded-android servants brought him followed by that Ker. She picked up the box and they laid him down on the bed. I asked for him to be changed to more appropriate sleeping clothes. And all of them refused my orders and left except for the one I despised. That’s it I want my team here now!

I was about to call my team through FTL until she rolled up Balem’s sleeves and showed me that his seal was active. That’s when I lost it but before I could react to it, she removed his white choker and jabbed a medipen onto my brother’s neck. Orous explanative! She should have warned me, I don’t like being reminded of mother’s little death games. It annoys me that he doesn’t use ReGenX to fix them, the cuts, hot burning chain marks, soft rope marks, and more that I can’t identify around his neck. I know because she has played those trust games with me. 

My rage subsided when I heard her sweetly whispered in his ear “Master.” Her voice singsong, “Master” and got a little louder.  “Master” she finally said in a normal tone as she was trying to control herself from touching his face. I went to shake him but she stopped me, telling me stop through FTL and holding me back with her arm.

My brother fluttered his eyes and turned his head to face us. She showed him the box and for a moment he closed his eyes. I guess he was ordering her about through FTL because as she got the box closer to his seal he tried to lift his arm to open the box. They must have drugged him enough for him not to harm himself. Ker slowly used her other hand to lift his on top of the box but he had to be the one to move his own hand to be able to open the box. It’s our seals safety protocols the two way communication between our FTL and the seal is supposed to let the Orous network know we did it of our own free-will.

As the lid dematerialized the box spoke in mother’s voice, “My Beloved Prince put it on” while it revealed an odd looking Memory HoloBand. Ker picked it up to show it to him and waited for approval. When she put it on Balem’s forehead, she told me through FTL that we were going view it too because he has equipped with temporary implant that clones to her what his FTL neuro network process and she’s passing the visual and audio info to me.

An image of mother in her youthful form dressed as an Aeon Angel with her crown of twelve golden wings that swayed as if they were alive. Passionately she stated, “My Sun I haven’t been able to show you unconditional love like you deserve yet even in death I love you and I will always love you.”

Our Mother Queen bowed full body to the ground, back on her knees, still with her head down she said in a genuine I’m sorry tone which I couldn’t believe, “My everything there was nothing you could have done to change me, I could only change myself, if you are viewing this I must have chosen to ascend instead of facing my mistakes.” Crying he tried to move his hands to take it off and I guess he was yelling at the Ker through FTL but she didn’t listen as it kept going, “I deserve worse than death because of what I have done to you and in turn the universe.”

She looked up to gaze longingly into my eyes, Balem’s since it’s just a copy for me, saying in a hopeful tone “I leave you the knowledge of ‘that Planet’ and the me of before I thought of having you as my companion that it may help you know what is broken within us, that one day you will learn the wisdom to heal yourself and our family. I hope one day you’ll be able to forgive me. And when we…” She didn’t finish since he was able to take it off. There were tears and I could see that my brother was anxious however I forgot about him when my emotions hit me.

I cried wanting to believe her but she always lies subtly. Mother always lies! Then I was wondering where was mine? I already went to my room an there was nothing there at all. Maybe she left it at our favorite place in Cerise. Now I wonder if she left something for Titus her pretend favorite.

He’s so weak and there’s only the Ker and I in this room. It would be so easy to end it all. And why do they even trust me? It has been over 5,000 years since I spoke to him or mother. Sitting by him on his bedside, I look down into his eyes to be shocked at what I see. I see trust. Trust I don’t deserve.

Leaning down to give him an open mouth kiss that only mother was allowed to give or receive, he accepted it except the Ker pulled me from him.

‘Don’t do THAT!’ the Ker had the nerve to yell at me again through FTL and redid his protective choker.

‘It was innocent’ I told her and was going to comment; you have seen how our mother gives us affection. Of course it wasn’t but neither was mother’s. I have to repeat to myself ‘he’s my brother, he’s my brother, umm half brother with enough diversity on the other half that it wouldn’t matter. By Abrasax, I forgot the pheromone blocking gear. And I’m so proud of myself for having so much self control without it.

As if the Ker read my mind she procured a set from her robes. I accepted it but asked her, “you didn’t rig these” and ‘you aren’t hacking in my mind and reading my thoughts through FTL?’

“That would be counterproductive my lady.” She replied while we have a stare down contest. ‘No I have enough with Master, following the protocols our queen left, and the board & commonwealth want him back to normal as soon as possible.’

‘Normal?! He has never been normal. They mean functional.’ I commented and then I asked, ‘Does he hate me for not talking to him or mother?’

She replied, ‘no. And he still loves you like a brother loves a sister. So stop it. He may not be able to discern it but I know the difference.’

I let her know, ‘that’s how mother showed us how to show affection’

She retorted, ‘not between each other… He’s asking for you. Slowly built up to be able for him to see Our Queen’s Memory HoloBand. Also, while I’m here I will divert his FTL active thought directed to you that you may hear them. Currently no information is allowed in or out from Master FTL without passing through me first. Also, don’t mention Lord Titus name.’ She broke her eye contact to look into Balem’s eyes.

I heard him whisper, ‘Kalique.’

Smiling and bowing down at the foot of his bed I happily replied out loud, “Balem… I am here for anything that you need or want, big brother.”

He tried to reach for me while commanding, ‘sit’

I wanted to prop him on my lap but instead I sat beside him by his head, he turned to look at me still smiling and still trusting me that I almost cried. After all that we have been through, all the cunning and deception, how can he still trust? When will he learn not to take things at face value? I don’t know how mother was able to create such a creature when she hated this verse so much.

Maybe mother was like him at the beginning and the verse made her bitter. All those kind memoires of us, big brother his true self and me, playing together, I recounted the best ones to him. When he brought me a flying pony, then when I was curious about dragons he showed me a tiny one and then introduced me to some of his saragon guards, playing hide-and-seek especially when I could convince him to go hide, and gardening. Yes, my big ancient brother played in the dirt with me. I am a moon and he is the sun.

Jealousy filled me for a moment, was mother like that when he was a child, until I remember the price he had to pay for being the primary heir, the first, and her true favorite. And being second doesn’t seem that bad at all. Also, I was jealous of mother too?! But I didn’t want to think about that.

My second favorite memory, like me the second heir, was when I begged him to dance with me; I would carefully stand barefooted on the top of his feet, and feel his large hand grasping mine, the other holding my back and I would concentrate fiercely on staying in step with him. Even though I knew if I ever stepped off the top of his feet his strong arms would pull me back and balance me.

I excluded my favorite memory which was my Entitled Ceremony where I was allowed in public to hold his hand, dance with him and be the only one, other than mother, allowed to touch him. All my girl friends were so jealous, and what shocked me was that the adults were also jealous of me.

No. No. NO. Annoying memories I don’t want to recall that and I shall never ever tell him. Why do I loathe you and love you at the same time mother? I kissed his forehead and waited to be chastised but it didn’t come. I asked him if I could move him onto my lap and he answered yes with his voice. I guess the drugs were wearing off.

I kissed his hands one by one telling him, “my prince” reminding him of the happy part of my childhood. And he replies, “My little princess.” It was our inside joke of us running away together to an unknown part of the universe to have no responsibilities other than what we wanted, where no one would know who we are, and would leave us in peace. We would help the primitive population and they would do most of the labor. Of course that’s what I was thinking but I think he actually wanted to do the physical labor.

Tangling my hands in his hair, I commented “I was going to raise wooly ruminants for the clothing I would make, tend our food forest, and help you hunt. Do you remember what you said?” and that Ker reprimanded me, ‘Don’t do that again, don’t fill his head up with silly fantasies.’

Balem replied, “Yes, finally being allowed to go on a real hunt, and I was going to learn archery, bow and arrow, and teach you… Do you still want to learn, _sister_?”

“Yes,” I joyfully accepted even though I already knew how.

It’s so wonderful not having the threat of mother coming in at any moment and making a scene. Obnoxious location device attached to our seals that once established can’t be turned off and it’s extremely hard to block.

I would regret it later but I couldn’t help myself knowing that mother was dead. I kissed him but unlike last time I pushed my tongue in his mouth, he opened, and I was elated that he accepted me.

‘What is WRONG with YOU? Didn’t tell you not to do that,’ I heard the ker through my FTL.

‘He’s number 1, I’m number 2, and you… you are nothing. Now get out!’ I reminded her of the hierarchy. Of course mother's orders from the grave are more important than the living, the ker stayed.

My half-brother, probably less, let out a sigh as he closed his eyes, and I gave the servant an ‘I won’ smirk. I am my mother’s daughter.

Kissing him again this time more passionately, I started to undo his frock cloak. He stopped me and said to soften the rejection, “in another lifetime Kalique.”

I thought now that mother is gone… I love you big brother and I will convince you that we do belong together but I didn’t say that out loud. He would think I’m crazy but many royal lines and breeders would be ok with it. Turning my head away from him, I don’t want him to feel guilty. I’m not going to be mother. I will try to not be her though my genes are the closes to her. It may seem like Titus has more but not everything in the verse is what it seems.

Gazing into those eyes I try to reassure him, “I promise to control myself, Balem.”

“Good. Stay beside me, tonight. _Sister_ ” he stated.

I lay beside him holding only his hand and wept. Mother was gone and instead of crying over her, I cry over not being able to be with him in that way. I am a horrible daughter and an awful half sister.

**"I walked around broken just barely coping. Getting it wrong, getting it wrong. How to you love someone without getting hurt? How do you love someoneon withouty crawling in the dirt? It' hard to talk to se what's deep inside. It's hard to tell the truth when you've always lied." How dow you love someone by Ashley Tisdale**


	3. Battle

Since his mother was monitoring his FTL, the twelve year old boy tried not to cry or scream he had seen this on the HoloVid before but there’s a huge difference in real life when dust and smoke sting his eyes, the stench of sweat and blood in his nostrils he can’t hardly breathe. Protected by a Smart A.I. Stealth Shield that will let the user experience everything till the situation gets life threatening, he tried not to close his eyes as a primitive person… not human he kept chanting to himself… it is an animal… swung his-its sword and caught another male in the throat, spraying blood, a fine mist, warm and bright red went everywhere that it stained his clothing. The animal ripped the sword free, another gush of blood, and the other male’s face pale and eyes wide, hands grasping at the wound as it fell to its knees choking and gurgling on its own blood.

Not being able to handle the actual sight of these animals fighting with each other over who knows what, little Balem emptied the contents of his stomach at the sight and thought mother’s going to be disappointed at him. He got extracted from the battle and brought near a river where his mother was in her 360 degree view fancy tent.

He knelt before her saying, “I’m sorry mother.”

The queen replied, “My Sun, a king never bows not even to his queen. He bows to no one,” pulling him up by the arms to stand. The little boy knew better, she wanted him to bow to her but of his own will so no matter how many times his mother protested he will always bow.

“We are the guardians of the universe. Does my prince see what those animals do to themselves? And do you want to know why those animals are fighting?” For the pleasantries she asks but it’s one more of her lectures.

Little Balem asked, “For resources and land? Like the nobles argue over planets?” He knew he made a mistake comparing them, the animals, to their nobles in Orous and waited for his punishment but it didn’t come.

“No silly little one, these animals are fighting over one female. Want to go see it?” His queen mother suggested.

Of course he’s going to say “yes” because his mother’s suggestions are really commands.

She grabbed his hand and ported, using a worm-hole portal, to the inside of a castle. They were in an open bedchamber. He heard a girl crying and struggling against restraints. Again the little boy had to remind himself that it was a female animal not a high human. His mother dragged him to where the female was struggling; she was chained to a metal loop in the middle of the room by a metal collar.  He was glad the captive couldn’t see them and beg the angels for mercy.

The doors opened and four males ranging in ages enter. The female screamed, “Let me go this instant! Or my father will kill you for this betrayal.”

The males laughed at her. “The girl is trying to still order us around. She doesn’t know her place YET,” the oldest one commented.

“You have forgotten what you are. We are going remind you,” the teen one told her.

“Stop talking to her,” the alpha ordered as he grabbed the female’s hair and yanked while she desperately and foolishly tried to keep him off her.

The Queen of the Universe knelt down behind her prince to hold on to his waist and told him through FTL, ‘watch.’  Yet she hid her face behind him. Little Balem didn’t understand why they were here and tried to not be anxious because in the end his mother will tell him.

“God the master is male and nature the slave is female. Son make your bride understand her place,” the older joked with the alpha.

 While she tried to fight the alpha she retorted, “I belong to NO one! My life is my own. And women are the bearers of life without us no one would be here…” she was hit and her mouth covered.

Laughing the older one said, “Oh let her scream for mercy.”

The alpha ripped his future wife’s clothes to mate with her and the rest followed him.

The little prince thought it was worst than war yet he didn’t cry but was numb and his mother is correct they are animals.

“If she lives she’ll remember it for months and she may need a reminding ever so often,” the alpha said to the rest of the males as they walked out of the room.

The queen turned her stealth part off, walked to face the captive and stared into her eyes. The female was enthralled and thought she was an angel. Of course it did because Seraphi was in her aeon costume with six white wings swaying in unison. She begged for her own death and thanked her gods for such a miracle.

“Tell him why you want to ascend to the afterlife,” the queen sweetly commanded as she switched on her son’s hologram angel custom on through her FTL and turned the stealth mode off him.

Little Balem appeared glowing blue white like an angel with a golden star crown and glowing halo on his head. His wings were longer and he held a golden staff with two winged feather snakes intertwined. “The ArchDuchess Nadja is your responsibility” free the stubborn spirit from its container because…’ the queen waited for his answer.

‘Its genetics are better for splices not for planets and this will cause a higher culling of the violent ones,’ he answered through FTL yet he didn’t want to do it. There’s a difference between pushing a button on a machine versus personally sending one to its next life.

“Sun Spirit, make me a martyr that the world may change. Please have mercy on me. Save me from a life of torture, save my people from torture. I’m worthless and of no use to them anymore,” captive begged in tears.

The Queen of the Universe passed through FTL Nadja’s medical scan to the prince showing the internal bleeding and expiration time, saying ‘end its miserable life, _now’_

Turning everything off within himself, little Balem followed his mother’s command. He shot her in the heart with the emergency pulse gun. His mother wasn’t going to be happy that he didn’t slice its head off but he couldn’t do it. Yet? The queen took the gun but didn’t say anything at all when they ported to the middle of a razed village.

A baby was screaming in the background. ‘Go save it,’ the queen commanded him. Little Balem ran to the baby and picked it up from a house that was about to collapse. It stopped crying in his arms and by the time he brought it to his mother the baby was asleep.

The little prince felt relief when he saw a nutrition flask in his mother’s hands. He waited for her permission, she gave it by handing the flask over saying, ‘feed it.’ Balem was elated that he actually got to save one of them. The baby drank greedily and by mistake the prince smiled.

‘Free it,’ she said. He couldn’t believe it that she had to say it twice. ‘Balem, free it now.’

Oh no, it is his fault for smiling he thought. “Please… mother” the little boy begged out loud. He wanted to say no but he was afraid of what she would do to him.

‘Then put it back where you found it. Since you rather it to burn or starve to death instead of ending its wretched life,’ she retorted, ‘it isn’t what I want or what you want that matters but what is needed. And you are not a _weakling_. You are the strongest of us all in body, mind, and spirit!’

Crying, Balem kissed the baby’s forehead; his mother placed his hands correctly to do it swiftly. A crack and its spirit was gone within seconds.

Eighty Thousand year old Balem woke up anxious as if his physical heart was going to literally explode. Opening his eyes to see his childhood room, he panicked until he felt an older hand take hold of his. He turned to see his adult sister smiling beside him; he smiled back, and activated his FTL to request a higher dose.

**Step by step/ Heart to heart /Left, right, left /We all fall down Like toy soldiers**   
**Bit by bit /Torn apart /We never win But the battle wages on For _toy soldiers” by Martika_**


	4. Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Right before the funeral. Sibling take advantage of each other's weaknesses. An awesome deer splice joins the games.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so glad there was no JA Category in fanfic.net and didn't know AO3 existed or this story would have been more mind-bending. Also, Its going to look like its going there, it does not. There are plenty of stories that do. I’ll list my fav below.

Orous: the human homeworld

Alone in the royal waiting room of the main commonwealth public relations building, my brother, the god was on his knees grabbing my legs underneath my black see-through dress like a little boy begging me not to go through with it. Why can he just get over it!

I’ve killed so many homo-sapien-sapiens (high humans) and it doesn’t faze me. He’s killed more people than the Aegis, our fake government, and he’s crying over one. One who wanted to go. Annoying momma’s boy needs to shut up and get it together before we face the public.

Wailing “It’s my fault… (sobbing) I should have listened to her (hic)… “

The doors open as Titus comes in earlier than his usual, a few seconds before we face the public, time.

Balem doesn’t notice Titus and keeps crying, “I’m responsible… (weeping like a dying animal)”

As Titus gives me a WTF look, I reply to it, “You know he thinks he is responsible for everything and everyone in the entire universe”

“Of course is his fault… He’s a weakling and I should be primary heir!” Titus retorted.

While Balem still whimpers I snapped at Titus, “Mother wanted us to be a family (Titus scoffed at me) Can you at least wait till after The Remembrance Ceremony to start fighting? Show that your really loved her by behaving yourself by doing what she wanted ‘happy family’ pretend time.”

My younger brother smiled and said, “Well at least now we know that _our dear brother_ isn’t an android.” Whew that was close.  Titus laughed and gave me a mischievous grin that I didn’t like at all.

In my FTL I looked up the time left before our presentation and panicked it’s over twenty minutes. Mother’s offspring, are like wolverines… sharks… we smell blood or weakness and attack. Still on his knees, exhausted Balem finally stopped crying and seem to be asleep.

Joking Titus, always jokes even when he is dead serious, “All the guards surround us, above, below, all around, yet here in this room we are alone… aren’t we?” He gently trailed his hand from Balem’s head all the way down to squeeze a cheek as if our brother was one of his toys.  “What is to stop us from doing what we want?” He said with lust in his eyes.

And in fake lament, “Our dear brother was so overwhelmed with grief… (fake sob) he couldn’t live without our dear mother… (a fake tear fell) that he decided to join her (lots of tears falling)” Wow, I knew Titus was a good actor but now I see he is better than me. I better up my game, improve my skills.

“Who is the PET NOW!” he said. Titus was such a distraction that I didn’t notice, till it was too late, him jabbing a medipen into Balem. “No” I whispered as I fought with myself, the one who wanted what Titus wanted and the decent me. Through FTL ‘hey Ker, do your job’

It replied back, ‘Already I’ve told my lady that Lord Balem cut me off his thought process and his entire FTL other than medical. I do the best I can, but you need to tell me when ‘lowering his strength down’ so that we, the medical team, in a panic won’t make a mistake and give more than needed.’

Keeping this attack to myself, I don’t want Titus to get in trouble with the board yet… also, I should have known Titus likes them begging or fighting. Feigning stupidity again, “what did you give _our dear brother_?” I said in the same tone he said ‘our brother’ as if I was going to go along with it.

With that adorable smug look on his face, Titus replied, “Oh just a little something to make him more receptive,” and winked at me.

Lifting my skirt Balem didn’t move but as I pulled his hands off my waist he looked into my eyes, I disliked that he had already checked out. But wanting to know how far Titus will go and knowing Balem trusts me, I pushed him backwards and parted his knees with my foot. Whishing that he fights because I can explain my behavior later, I feel as though I’m the Queen. Titus chuckles at my behavior, “ _Sister_ has some moves.”

Ack! I can’t stand the way he says ‘sister’ and how it makes my body react. Jerk, mother trained you well.  Oh by Abrasax, the way Titus gracefully lowers himself on to his knees behind Balem’s head and then kissed him so passionately that he almost made me believe that he loved him as much as I did. Big brother doesn’t react at all; like a doll he doesn’t even blink.

“Black suits you, _big brother,_ since you are the aeon of DEATH” Titus says as he smoothly runs his hands through Balem’s body then pulls our brother up lifting him to sit and straddle his lap, knees since Titus’ is still kneeling. Laughing he comments to me, “The real one acts more like an android than the android.”

That got a response, the response Titus was seeking to distract Balem, who isn’t adjusted to feeling anything. Little brother shoved his tongue so forcefully that Balem almost choked from the shock but he didn’t fight back and didn’t seem to react.

“Come join us, _sister_. Its mother’s ‘pretend family’ time,” little brother happily stated.  That’s when he got slapped by Balem. Except it hardly made a sound and didn’t bruise Titus at all.  That’s when I realized it wasn’t big brother’s usual checking out but the drugs. And will he remember any of this? Maybe Balem is surprise at his body’s reaction and maybe with me he will reciprocate. So I kneel beside my brothers, I kiss Titus first to let him think he is in control.

The sensation is extraordinary; almost life changing that if I didn’t know any better I would think he loves me.  How could a kiss make my entire body vibrate with want and need to give him anything he wants? Titus is perfect. For the job he has.

Titus held Balem’s head for me but I pushed his hands away. I laughed internally because Titus doesn’t realize that I can kiss big brother, like mother used to kiss us, any time I want. No one is here to stop me this time. They shouldn’t have trusted me.

When kissing Balem, I tried to mimic Titus first kiss by licking his upper lips slowly almost as if to tickle him, and then his lower lip.  Once I lubricated them sufficiently with my saliva, I moved my lips around his lips and with my saliva wet both of our outer mouths.

Holding his head with my right hand by grabbing some of his hair by the roots and pulling just a little, I sucked on his bottom lips gently then tried to push my tongue past his teeth. It was a surprise when he let me; oh wonderful drugs or he’s trying to get Titus angry. It doesn’t matter to me. Yet I’m frustrated because he doesn’t reciprocate. Angry I suck on his tongue and with my left hand grab the unresponsive part between his and Titus legs.

Titus chuckles, then his hand joins mine below while he licks the side of Balem’s cheek. Little Brother licks both of my and big brother’s lips as I’m still kissing him then shoves me back hard that I my head hits the ground behind my feet since I’m still kneeling. Jerk.

By the time I get back up, Titus has pinned Balem’s back to the ground with his legs wide open and little brother in-between them. While Balem miserably failed at pushing Titus away, little brother laughed, “Go ahead call for help on FTL! It’s not going to work…”  

‘Ker!’ I call through the hacked connection.

‘Yes, milady’ it replied.

‘Nothing, just checking’ whew that one is still working but the rest, we are cut off.

“Fine” Titus replied to Balem’s non-hitting by slapping him on both sides of his face so hard it left hand bruises. Big brother was shocked and Titus snickered as he slowly open his shirt and ran a finger down his pecks, “The drugs didn’t affect your voice brother… Scream for me… I’m the TRUE HEIR. You do your tasks out of duty but I do them because I want to. Oh and Mother loved me more.”

Wow! Little brother is tactless… really tactless.  

Balem scoffed at the last line and then smiled. Titus wasn’t pleased that big brother was smiling, “Still thinking you’re better than me? I’m going to wipe that smile off your face, dear brother, and then you’re going to beg me for mercy.”

With delirious ill laughter, Balem dared Titus, "make it react... any reaction in exchange for my share of the next harvest" as he unclasped his dark metal choker.

Little brother licked his lips and planted a wet one on Balem before stating, "Giving me permission makes no difference... It has zero to do with sexuality and all about power, control, and who's the dominant one!"

Big brother pretending to be above emotions retorted, "Mother’s Pet, which of the splice nannies or nursemaids abused you as an infant? The goats… the canines… or the deer?”  All my servants were high humans and my one nursemaid an Entitled. Maybe we shouldn't fault you for your behavior since you got fed by animals and have attachment issues. Mother should have taken better care of you instead of getting into jealousy rages and killing off your nursemaids.”

“Mother LOVES ME MORE! She spent more time with me during my childhood THAN YOU, the Abrasax A.I. program says I'm much more attractive than you, and at least I didn't kill them like…” Little brother didn’t get to finish because I pushed him off and stabbed him with the medipen that was meant to instantly knock out Balem.

“Are you ok, big brother?” I asked not really wanting to know but as damage control.

Still on the ground, “No, it felt nothing, nothing at all. Mother is right my body, my mind, and my spirit all belong to the company and no one else.” And he started crying again after saying, “Not… even… _her_.”

The doors opened with our human servants coming to outfit us with our ceremonial gear and Titus deer running towards us. It jumped over and ignored Titus body to prostrate, kneel full body on the ground, for Balem.

Big brother turned to look at it. I feared for its life, the deer was a good loyal servant and kept Titus out of trouble. But laws are laws; splices aren’t allowed to enter this building. Death was the penalty, so how in the verse did it got pass security.

“Deer thinks it’s worth the pet’s life.” He commented as he stood up.

While the servants dressed me, I answered trying to win favor with Titus main assistant, “It is a free splice that has survived more than 12,000 years, my lord, and has been a loyal company drone.” Instead of my usual HoloCustom we were given full integrated prosthetics without any seams as if we were born with golden wings. Like true aeon angels, I had six wings on my back and on my crown, all twelve swayed in unison.

Raising his hands up to let the servants know they can assist him. “One of its nannies,” not a question but waiting for confirmation. They outfitted him with his, nine wings and his crown was a merge of nine wings and star/sun like a halo around his head.

No is the answer. I would have said yes if it was. So I gave the information he really needed to know, “From the Astral, Tech, and then Research & Development Department, my lord.” Hopefully he will realize what a valuable team member it is and let it live. Abrasax is law.

Balem turned to the deer still with its head down, “Famulus, up.”

I was surprised by the used of its name. It got up onto its knees and kept its head down.

“Look” he commanded and it did, “How many” he asked it.

Without flinching or hesitating it answered, “Zero. Never.”

“How did the pet take it,” he almost sounded amused.

“Her Majesty forbade him from raping me, and as a test requires not only my verbal consent but my true consent.”

“The consequences for trespassing.”

“DEATH. My life belongs to the company and I willingly sacrifice it for the greater good.”

“Scan it. Breeder Tag.” He said it out loud when he could have said it through FTL. Scan to make sure it isn’t lying and to Breeder Tag it later that when attached it will make sure it stays that way. Just a kiss sets the device’s silent notification in the Abrasax network. As former R&D drone, the deer knows all of our codes.

An Entitled station garment and box was brought before them. He waved his hands and the human servants stood the deer up and ripped the splice clothing. I must say it was adorable with baby deer spots on its back and a cute deer tail. Then an advance FTL holo progamming was given. It made it look full human, it made her smell human, and I wanted to see how well it worked. So I touched her head were the horns currently are and all I felt was hair and skull. I touched her behind and it was smooth as human baby.

As they dressed her in Entitled clothing, I didn’t like that at all! Looking at my big brother in confusion, he gave me one of his rare genuine smiles. Oh! He’s going to push our little brother to his limits. As mother always said ‘death is mercy.’

They servants finished with unconscious Titus also. He had four wings and crown of four too. All of us dressed in black for the first part of the ceremony, the bright colors will be for the celebration part, and white for ascending goodbye.

“OUT” Balem whispered and everyone scurried out. Famulus knew it wasn’t directed at her and stayed put.

When everyone left big brother stunned me by commanding her to kiss him. What? Did I hear him right? Yes, because he said it again and she had the nerve to say NO.

“Now that’s out of the system… yield. Those orders where for the pet _not me_.”

“No” Famulus said without fear.

He got close to her to stare at her intently, closed his eyes for a few moments and said, “I spare your life and this is how _you_ repay me... I desire no one, especially not an animal… I’m not my brother who mates with anything that he can rub himself against.”

Oh that got her angry but the deer controlled itself.

She changed her mind and slowly went to kiss him. Now that my FTL is back, I check the surveillance of mother’s body to see if she’s rolling in her stasis chamber. Darn she didn’t roll.

He kissed her back and now I wonder if he is doing this to infuriate me too.  She grabbed his hand and he flinched back, ignorant splice doesn’t understand that she has to move slowly.  She excused herself, “to make it seem more believable, my lord.”

Grrr… She turned towards Titus and I then he let her move his hands for each to cup her breasts while she still kissed him. Jerk, he knew how to kiss all along and teased me by running his tongue over her lips. “Balem” she said steamily before he took her lips again. That’s when I noticed Titus was back.

I smile remembering it was a show just for him and not for me. We are mother’s offspring. And big brother isn’t as naïve as I took him to be. Snickering at Titus red face, I give extend my hand to help him up but he refuses and uses his wings to fly.

Balem lets go and Famulus bows to the ground again as the door opens with the high priest and priestess followed by the ker and six other spiritual advisors, the rest of the kers. They know it isn’t human they must but ignore it. Titus lands and I’m impressed that he still has manners.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Siblings  
> A dragon flies - vivian  
> The best intentions - cariandra  
> The mother we share - arcaya  
> The Mistake (m/m)- OracleAbrasax 
> 
> Parental  
> Theogonia by vivian  
> Surface Tension by canterville for vivian
> 
> Oops newbie just remembered bookmarks


	5. Remembrance (Funeral)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Remembrance; all the contributions Seraphi had made to the universe. The last Life & Death game Balem thought he passed and thinking his mother is still playing the game.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Story is NR – R or NC17 most of the time I don’t really know the difference because I don’t understand how killing/hurting someone is PG and regular body parts we all should know by age 5 or loving someone is R. But because of subject matter and torture this chapter is NC-17. (The eye opening FACTS & Prevention tips at end notes)

All nine, the priestess, priest and all female assistants, bowed on their knees before the Abrasaxs. Kalique stood and bowed her head on Balem’s right. Titus held back his emotions to stand to Balem’s left and also bow his head. Balem inclined his head for a second and the priestess spoke.

“Most High, they are all here in the living flesh. All Entitleds, all high nobles, and Aegis who have earn their spot defending our realm.”

“The next level completed.” Balem asked about the space in the building for the new nobles.

“Yes, Most High.” One of the assistants answered.

“Let them in early only for this occasion in exchange for waiting twenty more years.” The primary heir was stalling and it was a good Public Relation stunt.

“It will be done, Your Highness.” The same assistant acknowledged testing him to slowly switch to later calling him ‘your majesty.’ They all knew that Lord Balem detested change.

Buying himself an hour more while they recalibrated the new nobles with portal access codes into their new chairs, Balem thought maybe this is just one of mother’s tests like the last one and when he is done delivering her lines perfectly when they leave she will walk up to congratulate him.

He remembered when she finally considered him an adult and held back the tears.

\--

His mother finally called him home, he tried not to run or think of the rumors. Instead to walk slowly and deliberately like he usually did. The doors opened to her room as he heard a creaky raspy voice call out, “Balem my sun.”

Balem confused stood in the doorway.

“I know you will recognize me and love me no matter what form I take, my Balem.” The queen said.

He forced himself to walk forward towards her but bowed his head because he couldn’t look at her like that, he just couldn’t.

“Come here” she said and placed her wrinkly boney hand on his cheek. He didn’t shudder because he had absolute control over his body yet mentally he did.

She placed an open mouth kiss on his lips as she usually did and it felt horrible to him that he didn’t notice a tear falling from his eye until she took it with her wrinkly finger. Balem got stiff and waited for her retaliation but none came.

He was perfectly still waiting and waiting anxious to get the punishment over for showing weakness but instead she hugged him. SHE HUGGED HIM?! What is wrong with her? He thought.

Balem forced himself to look up at the wrinkly thing before him and searched its eyes for her, “Mother”

“I’m here my sun, I will always be here with you.” She said placing her hand on his chest.

The primary heir kissed those horrid lips back even if he didn’t want to but he knew he had to. That earned him a wrinkly smile. Seeing animal stock looking better than her when getting older, he didn’t understand why she was so bony and wrinkly. Using his FTL he asked why? To her servants and they told him she had gone from vegetarian with milk and eggs to no animal substances to just eating the stars rays and almost refusing water too. He ordered liquid ruminant gelatin to taste like soak legumes (pea protein) and berries.

And instead of telling him all the things she had done for him since the moment he was born she commented, “I love you my son.” And instead of testing his knowledge the queen commented, “So beautiful… My boy who always uses resources wisely, grey hair suits you.”

Balem waited for her to do her usual check but she didn’t. So he started to take his clothes off and she didn’t stop him. This worried him because she would have slapped his hands and taken over the task to count how many more freckles he had gotten. That was the only thing he didn’t get blamed for because she chose the genes and he quite enjoyed her fretting over him.

The Queen Mother laughed an amusing laugh and took over as she usually did but didn’t punish him for getting ahead of her. He hated the wrinkly bony hands… really hated them. And what was worse is that she ignored her usual gird and logic but instead touched and kissed him randomly so he wasn’t ready for those wrinkly things, yet all that matters is that she is happy.

The queen was crackling laughing at herself he guessed as she squeezed the side of his calf. Again he tried not to shudder and tried to think what horrid things Titus would say to her or worse since mother’s pet chases anything with a pulse maybe he likes mother this way.

“Has my little brother grace you with his presence.” He said forcing himself to call him ‘little brother’ since that’s what she likes him to do. It was a mistake because she got quiet.

She didn’t want to tell him the numerous fights she had with the board and how they kept him and all her offspring away from her. But she did tell him that she didn’t use ReGenX as much anymore to try to get the other nobles to follow but only one of the Entitleds did. The queen also didn’t tell him that it was her best friend who hacked the network and called them, her offspring.

The queen told him her horrible experience with his little brother. Titus thought that someone was playing a cruel joke. The youngest Abrasax thought, yes mother wanted to stop the harvest but not to the point of her dying or looking like that. There was no way that was her. He tried to talk her into a nectar bath but she refused when that didn’t work he tried to drag her but her assistants stopped him. He left furiously and said that he would be back with reinforcements. She added at the end, “You won’t let him and you’ll protect me won’t you Balem.”

“Of course Mother,” he said because he was planning on giving her what she wanted even though she acted like she didn’t by forcing her to have a recoding soon.

She cried because Kalique didn’t answer her FTL, calls, or correspondence. One more crying outburst like that and Balem was going to lose his patience. He got saved by the knock on the door the distraction of them manually knocking instead of letting him know through FTL.  The queen took her robe off to cover him with it. She was torturing him with that crinkly container. He had wrinkles but not like that!

“I want to be just like you mother,” he said as they brought two plates of the substance masquerading as vegetarian fodder.

Testing her he picked up the spoon and tried to feed her. She passed by grabbing it from him and bringing it to his mouth for him to eat it. He did knowing that he had built a resistance to that sleeping concoction but she still isn’t immune to it.

After feeding him seven spoonfuls off her plate, she took his and ate from it. He thought that old brain must be fried or her hunger overwrote her intelligence. Then in realization she looked at him fighting it but before she drifted the queen reminded him who was in charge by dumping the rest of the plate on him.

Balem picked his mother’s naked body off the floor where she fell trying to get up while throwing the green goo on him.  Bringing the queen’s body to the recoding room, he triumphantly thought ‘no contest Titus. You call me an android but your emotions get in the way of progress and passing the test.’

He took the robe off thinking his mother must think him more advance to play more complex life and death life games. The primary heir walked into the pool, opened the queen’s mouth, watched her body drown in ReGenX, and waited till all the bubbles had stopped before going under. The lagoon pulsed making their cells recode to be in their twenties.

As soon as Seraphi came up she grabbed Balem by the hair, he always lets her do whatever she wants, and dragged him outside of the pool. She lets go of his hair and he lays down on the floor while she seethes in anger standing over him.

The queen FTL’s for her special knives, that have ReGenX within them and the pulsing technology so that the person on the receiving end feels the pain, the blood loss, gets regenerated, and the cycle starts again. She straddles him telling him, “You are perfect. Your mind is perfect, your body is perfect, and so is your individual soul yet you have become a monster… my beautiful monster.” Tears fell down her cheeks and onto his chest.

Seraphi thought time to clean house and start all over again, “Thank you for saving me.” He found it odd that she thanked him since it is his job to protect her and he almost failed. She ran her hands from his navel making circles around his six pack ribs and ending up with her two hands around his neck.

Finally the FTL destroying hyponeedle got to her. She had ordered it for her but now it has a better use. Seraphi gave Balem her usual open mouth kiss, jabbed the hyponeedle into his main FTL line and then she semi-choked him.

When his FTL implant didn’t help him, he tried not to panic and succeeded staying calm with the pain she was causing with her hands choking him.

At that moment she forgot the harvests and was furious that she trained him so well that his body won’t respond to anything. The queen thought she already broke him and there’s no reasoning with him so she might as well enjoy herself before she frees him from the container, the body, she forced him in.

  
  
  
  
**\----- NC17 more XXX ack! did I write that?! Skip Adona definitely skip this part -----**  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The queen let herself feel the lust she couldn’t quench with facsimiles, even enhanced bodies with an outer copy of him wouldn’t do. Balem was supposed to save her from herself but he became all the worst qualities of her, all the things she hated in humanity, and all the hate she didn’t feel anymore. And even after all the torture she has put him through there he is looking at her lovingly as if he enjoyed such things.

She hated herself and thought will he stop me? Because her mind said NO but her body wanted that which she shouldn’t have. Rationalizing she told herself that genetically she is one of six parents. Also many souls reincarnate together daughters become wives in another lifetime and so forth. So did it really matter that she doesn’t want to wait for the next lifetime? She rubbed herself against him. He looked at her in surprise. She laughed that she got a reaction.

Balem didn’t understand why his mother was doing such things; she was sexually aroused like animal. It must be another test he must past to show his commitment to the company demonstrating that all his energy goes only to Abrasax Industries. He has passed these challenging tests with flying colors and remembered that nothing could be harder than when his mother forced him to torture and kill his only secret best friend when she found out.

The queen thought it through and decided she was going to free them all and start all over because how dare they, the board she created, keep her from her offspring and cut her communication. Her primal brain took over thinking that two objects can’t take the same space and the old society will not accept the new one but see it as a threat.

But that didn’t matter as her body full of euphoria from ReGenX took over control. Kissing Balem passionately didn’t satisfy her at all, she wanted more. She thought she should have been born male as her parents wanted her to be, so she penetrated him with the only part of her natural body she could use by tilting his head to rest on his shoulder to have better access and gave him another open mouth kiss, this made Balem open his mouth willingly letting her have the chance to shove her tongue down his throat.

Strap-ons with biofeedback didn’t satisfy her, being in the body of a male SIM didn’t satisfy her… she loved being female the creator and destroyer of life. It was just the feeling of power that came with forcing a part of yourself onto another self but not just any other being but the one that she, with the others, called down from the planes above in to a mortal body.

He was choking on her tongue, and thinking I deserve this for failing. The only nicety left form his childhood is now gone. Gone are the days were she sang lullabies, gone are the day were she read him history, and today was the last day she thought of him as her child. Balem tried not to cry but failed miserably as the tears fell and she let go to slap him for crying. That’s not what she wanted. Seraphi wanted his body to want hers. Who did he think he is? Is she not good enough?

She reached down opening the lips of her labia and noticed that from the excitement she was covered in her lubricating pre-excrement and had it all over Balem’s covering. Seraphi hated it. She hated that she didn’t rip it off like all the others females and males equally. Her primitive friend had talked her into keeping his foreskin by saying that he was perfect. And it annoyed her that it protected him from her. Any other male would have already been over taken by instinct to pound into her and no matter how many times they ejaculated they were never satisfied. She loved that power over them. Payback for all the times they controlled her body.

Balem thought this isn’t going to happen… it’s just a test and at the end when she sees how good he can control himself without his FTL she will stop. And she’ll be proud of him.

Seraphi will not wait. Moving down enough to see him, she pulled up his penis by the skin grabbed that extra skin at the tip and with as much force as she could muster she yanked it down making it bleed and exposing him to her. Balem screams of pain filled her ears. She loved it remembering when they made her bleed in pain pleasure.

  
  
  
  
**\----- End of this part -----**  
  
  
  
  


Loving the genuine contorted look of pain on the most powerful being in the universe’s face, Seraphi remembered she created him and smiled but then the queen got pulled back into reality when the servants presented her knife set. She let go of him. He reminded her of her Kna’ani so she started crying again.

The primary was still in shock that his mother would do such a thing. He knows that she knows how bodies work and that the lower humans hurting each other this way was one of her main complains. He was happy when he saw the knives set knowing that he is able to handle that pain without his FTL assistance. Except when he saw her drain the ReGenX out of them that’s when he started to panic and needed to count his breathing.

Remembering to stay still while she stabs as to not lose as much blood or pass out from the pain, Balem looked into his mother’s eyes saying out loud, “I will always love you,” before she inserted the knife right below his heart. Unbeknown to him that set her off.

‘You are not Kna’ani, he is gone taking his life away from me because of the harvests. I know he will come back after the harvests have stopped and when you are gone.’ Seraphi said to herself as she plunged in another knife into Balem’s body.

He stayed awake for all twelve smiling as he finally let go to pass out. Seraphi FTL warned her as usual that her son had flat-lined and counted the maximum amount of time for him to be gone before brain damage starts and before irreversible damage starts which had a different alarm and visual.

“I am free” the queen said out loud, “free of my mistakes and free to start again,” which got the servants nervous much more nervous than the crazy talk of stopping the harvests.

Seraphi heard the alarm for brain damage go off, ignored it and starting pulling off the knives one by one. Her blood lust had cooled off by seeing her problem finally dead. They have to accept her. Now that she is starting to fix her mistakes.

The queen got knocked out by security servants and Balem was re-coded before reaching the third alarm. Seraphi was taken to her room and her best friend got called to calm her down for when she wakes up.

In the nectar lagoon, Balem woke up in a daze yet overjoyed that he passed his mother’s test again. And thought he truly must be perfect now. The perfect owner, the perfect king, the perfect son, the perfect friend and companion he is meant to be. He lost count of how many times he has been dead and has been reborn that he must be a god.

\--

He came back the awful reality that was before him as the top five Entitled family heads, all female, entered twelve minutes before the start of the ceremony ignoring famulus the fake human. Balem remembered all the great things his mother and him had accomplished in this universe in this plane. He knew that at the end of this celebration his mother the queen will be waiting at the end to congratulate him.

And now that she’ll have a forced vacation because they think she had ascended, they both can calmly and rationally discuss harvesting in all planes of existence. He adores discussing ideologies and new ideas even though mother is always right. Also, Balem loved that she didn’t mind entertaining absurd ideas as long as their merits were discuss in her usual calm manner.

Seeing through his FTL that the top Aegis, TSing mother’s current favorite, another female and seven males were ready in the upper circles of the center pyramid, the Entitleds ported to their space, then Titus and Kalique, and finally he took one last breath before he ported to the top, the space he used to share with his mother.

It was awe-inspiring seeing over one hundred thousand humans, high humans, organized and in harmony but still very competitive helping each other become the best, he started his speech with the same line mother always did, “My compeers lend your hearts, minds and bodies that we may have peace in our realm.”

He continued mother’s speech, “We are all seraphim ceaseless and eternal, our heat and keenness, the exuberance of our intense, perpetual, tireless activity, and our elevative and energetic assimilation of those below, kindling them and firing them to our heat, and wholly purifying them by a burning and all consuming flame; and by unhidden, unquenchable, changeless, radiant and enlightening power, dispelling and destroying the shadows of darkness”

And Kalique recites what used to be his lines, “We burn with the fire of charity as the highest models of human aspiration. We are impatient of any second place, when we emulate dignity and glory then, if we will it, we shall be inferior to Aeons in nothing.”

And he thought Titus saying Kalique’s lines was hilarious because they, the board members, skew reports to show that Titus contributes just as much as they do. “In the light of intelligence, meditating upon the Creator's work, and the work in its Creator, we shall be resplendent with the light of the Aeons. If we burn with love for the Creator only, the consuming fire will quickly transform us into the flaming likeness of the Aeons.”

Back to Balem for remembering his mother, “Seraphi the Queen of the Universe”

Everyone, “may she reach home safely”

Balem, “has remade The Great Chain of Being for all humankind.”

Everyone, “for our freedom, we thank Our Great Mother”

Entitled one, “All humankind is born free.”

Everyone, “we thank Our Great Mother Seraphi”

Entitled one continues, “All humankind is born an equal. By merit we rise. Recurring DNA must prove themselves worthy of their old position. All who contribute: will receive food, will receive shelter, and advancement of knowledge. It is our right.”

Everyone, “we are all equal.”

Entitled two, “Rights of all Orous Citizens and Planets under the protection of the Commonwealth”

Everyone, “Blessed are the Aegis created by Our Great Mother Seraphi for our protection.”

Entitled two continues, “All sentient animal offspring regardless of species has the right to food, shelter, security, and education in their own level.  Security includes no threatening of violence or expulsion from the group. Company or Gov’t responsible years per level as follows; Homo-sapien-sapiens twelve years, splices four years, and three for animals and homo-sapiens in captivity, if in the wild they form their own systems then our responsibly is nullified.”

Everyone, “we are all protected.”

Entitled three, “The right of belonging to a group; each individual is crucial. Each individual having responsibilities that help the entire team reach their goals. Everyone is an important member of our family and everyone takes great pride in completing our roles. We are a cohesive team.”

Everyone, “we are one.”

Entitled four, “The right to family, denoted by offspring ages and levels above, keeping the family group together unless it is an emergency”

Everyone, “we honor our life receivers.”

Entitled five, “The right to knowledge and gaining new skills: to be stimulated, challenged, and tested. Having masters that show the individual new skills so that each person may become masters in their own time. Shall they prove themselves worthy by merit they may receive the knowledge for initiation of the next level.”

Everyone, “knowledge is power.”

They where supposed to play a hologram-video of the queen stating the end of harvesting and that her ex-disciples a secret group probably killed her for trying to stop the harvest. Only the top Entitled saw it and decided not to ruin the ceremony, letting the Aegis and Abrasax Industry handle her disciples.

Balem and his siblings ported to the next area where the young body of their mother hovered in a special clear force field were the top would accept entrance and the bottom would keep things from falling almost like a clear casket. They had at least an hour before the top Entitled would port there too.

 Titus ran straight towards the pod to kiss their mother while Kalique stayed by Balem’s side. He still had his eyes closed hoping that he would hear her voice say, “My sun I forgive you.” But their mother stayed silent.

Kalique through FTL suggested to Balem, ‘closer’ meaning she was going to hold his hand and bring him closer to their mother. He took her hand and let her lead him. Titus tried to hold Balem’s hand too but the primary refused.

The youngest cried, “How was I supposed to know that there where survivors on that planet from the last harvest? All I wanted to do was to prove to mama that I could be just like you, big brother.”

Balem opened his eyes giving Kalique a WTF is Titus talking about now. She replied, ‘Baby’ meaning Titus thinks he’s the center of the universe. The sister wasn’t going to tell him that they blamed the high dissident planet that has been erased from history.

She liked that the primary needed her. Deciding to rile Titus up and check on her status with her brother, Kalique kissed Balem on his lips while Titus held his hand and this time he didn’t push his little brother away.

“We are one family” Titus repeated and kissed Balem’s hand denoting that he has yielded to the primary’s authority. Balem stepped away from Kalique while Titus commented, “I’m ready to learn.”

The little mischievous prince bowed saying, “Tell me what to do big brother; I am but your humble servant.”

It worked because Kalique felt sorry for him and pushed him closer to Balem while saying, “Mother wanted us to be a family. She said we are equal with different responsibilities that work to our strengths. We are a team working towards one goal.”

Through FTL Kalique tells Titus, ‘on the cheek slowly’

But Titus remembers Balem making out with Famulus and didn’t take his sister’s warning. Touching Balem’s face with his hand and then slowly kissing him, Titus couldn’t help but to embrace his big brother in a hug.

The primary let that pass because he didn’t want to think about his mother. Also he remembered mother’s equality speech when he was young that males and females are equals. And that everyone should be given the chance to be their best self. So he let Titus kiss him. Then Titus trailed kisses down his chin and he almost laughed at the tickling sensation that reminded him of mother which made him start crying again.

Balem threw himself on top of his mother’s body kissing her and crying on her shoulders. Kalique tried to pull the primary off the body while Titus complained that she should let their brother do whatever he wants. The top Entitleds and their immediate family saw him in that moment of weakness.

“My lord, like my parents, Our Queen Mother has ascended and is now watching over us. She knows how much we all miss her and that we appreciate all that she has done for us and this universe.” Mother’s best friend new Entitled heir offered her condolences.

Balem let go of his mother’s body hoping that he didn’t mess the chance of her coming back by him not being perfect. He turned around to face the heir who spoke to him and hugged her. Everyone was awes trucked by such a display of kindness from him especially since he was the one who had order that heir to show her Loyalty to Abrasax Industries by killing her parents’ ex-disciples of her mother in front of the other Entitleds. And he didn’t even know about the queen’s video till this afternoon. So they are going to take it as a thank you.

As the primary he’s supposed to be the first to throw dirt on their mother’s body to bid her goodbye. Everyone brought dirt from their best harvest planet or their alcazar. Balem brought fresh dirt from Reah his first planet. He wanted to bring some form Earth but couldn’t muster the courage to be near that solar system. While he was gaining the courage to throw some, others’ probably thought he was meditating, the same Entitled heir brought a small flask in front of him and said “Favorite.”

Now the other Entitleds where suspicious of the new Entitled heir but Balem wasn’t because the heir's mother was Earth’s regent and his mother’s best friend. He emptied the flask of dirt into his hand saying in his head, ‘Mother please wake up after the celebration, this dirt isn’t going to cover you but instead be collected behind you. We are going to make a garden with all of it, figure out what types of plants you want to grow out of dirt from around the universe.’ As he turned to leave the spot for Kalique, he smiled and everyone was relieved that he was better than normal.

Kalique brought crushed jewels from Cerise that looked like sparkly glitter instead of dirt and said in her mind, ‘I will do my job to the best of my ability. May your journey be pleasant and that we may meet again.’

Titus brought a small ring instead of dirt. The sphere on it was filled with the best ReGenX his refinery ever produced. Putting the ring on his mother’s ring finger, ‘we will meet again and until then I will honor you and all that you have taught me momma.’

The youngest stepped to the oldest left side and reached to hold his hand since Balem was already holding Kalique’s hand on his right side. Balem nodded almost bowing his head and everyone in the room, the top Entitleds and their families, bowed back before the Abrasaxs ported out.

* * *

 

Titus to Seraphi “A song for mama” boyz to men

There were so many times  
Looking back when I was so afraid  
And then you come to me  
And say to me I can face anything  
And no one else can do what you have done for me  
You will always be the girl in my life, ooh oh  
  
Mama, mama, you know I love you  
Mama, mama, you're the queen of my heart  
Your love is like tears from the stars  
Mama, I just want you to know  
Lovin' you is like food to my soul

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Tell people the FACTS**  
>  95% of sexual abusers are family and friends not strangers or internet. Oh and 58-53% percent of sexual abusers of children 0 to 6 – 7 to 11 are family members. (that’s not happening in this story but the sad part it is happening right now in Real Life)  
> <http://www.childmolestationprevention.org/pages/tell_others_the_facts.html>
> 
> **CNN Article: I don't own my child's body excerpt**  
>  Ordering children to kiss or hug an adult they don't want to touch teaches them to use their body to please you or someone else in authority or, really, anyone.
> 
> "The message a child gets is that not only is another person's emotional state their responsibility but that they must also sacrifice their own bodies to buoy another's ego or satisfy their desire for love or affection," said Lehr.
> 
> "Certainly no parent would wish for their teenager or adult child to feel pressure to reciprocate unwanted sexual advances, yet many teach their children at a young age that it's their job to use their bodies to make others happy," she said.  
> Prevent it. Let your child say NO to Adults. Say NO to you.  
> <http://www.cnn.com/2012/06/20/living/give-grandma-hug-child/>


	6. The language of the Universe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aleska and Max meet

A few thousand years later

On Earth

It was Thor's day and the applied mathematics professor was finally done for the day. On the way home she saw a crazy guy in the wrong type of clothing freezing and staring up at the sky.

"What on Earth are you doing?" Aleska asked him.

"Isn't it a marvelous?" Max enthusiastically replied. Still in awe of the telescope and it’s new modifications.

Overjoyed like a child with a new toy and full of life, "Tonight the sky is completely full of miracles."

It is true, the stars shine the same for everyone, she thought before saying, “Yes, the stars are wonderful but please put a jacket on to not freeze."

He laughed not at her but at himself like mischievous boy, "my lady, where do they put the meat to keep it fresh?" he asked.

"On ice or hanging in the cool air?" she didn't understand the reason for such a question.

"I am a meat popsicle..." he laughed some more, "we are all meat popsicles!” then he got serious, “The stars remind me of how small and insignificant we are yet how every life is precious. To the butterfly three days is eternity, to a dog eighteen years is a lifetime, but to us eighty years isn't enough. I try to live as if every day was my last day that is why I didn't care for a jacket... Sorry for my rambling. I'm Maximilian Jones the Astrophysics professor, my lady."

Oh such sweet manners and such passion she thought before saying her name. He forgot about the stars and stared at her instead then he noticed what he was doing and blushed. Aleska fell in love right there. She saw in him to be a man who knew how to be passionate and how to be humble and not arrogant.

“You are going to be one if you stay out any longer… would you like to join me for some coffee or tea?” She asked him.

“Ah, my lady I do not wish to burden you with my company.” He replied.

“Oh, Professor Jones I insist and you can talk about the planets, the stars, and help me talk some sense to my sister Nino who likes to dabble in astrology. Please.” She somewhat begged.

Max couldn’t resist, “As you wish, my lady.” He raised her hand and gave it a kiss.

Aleska couldn’t believe her own actions as she opened the door to her place. He stopped in front of her door to give a worried look then smiled before saying, “you have the table of elements, and ‘Minkowski addition of sets’ framed as artwork!”

“I’m a practical person who likes to use math to help make our lives better. No fancy theories here just real math based on reality.” She said it proudly.

That amused him immensely and retorted, “Not everything is what it seems. And the unseen is more important than what can be seen…”

She laughed and motioned for him to sit down on one of the two wooden chairs around her tiny kitchen table, “Oh so you’re into quantum mechanics too?”

As he sat down he put a finger over his mouth as if to say quiet, “Quantum Astrophysics but that’s way too advance for the university and people will have me committed or worse killed.” Max said the last part by slashing his throat with his finger, sticking his tongue out, and being funny about it.

 “Will you help me with my sister’s obsession over astrology not astronomy? It is talking about the stars and planets.” She asked while putting the hot water on for tea.

Smiling at her, he commented, “The magic of astrology is science not understood. The current version of the system is corrupted but passable to those that can interpret it. Using the original system will give better results. I’m sorry I only know that’s not the original and not how to find the information needed for your sister.”

Aleska giggled at his attempt not to insult her silly sister. In his presence she felt she couldn’t think. “What is your favorite planet?” she asked a stupid question as the kettle whistled.

In her presence he forgot to be cautions, and answered “Jupiter the biggest most beautiful and most powerful planet in the solar system.”

She thought of course because that planet has the most gravitational pull and saves Earth from most of the asteroids. Aleska placed the tea in the infuser and in the kettle. And he asked the same question of her. She replied Earth because it’s the planet I live on.

Over tea he let her talk about her Applied Mathematics classes and her dream of switching it to an Applicable Mathematics class. He asked questions, seem really interested in her work, and didn’t mind at all that she was a smart woman. Of course she thought she was smarter than him since he deals with theories and she deals with reality.

Aleska was infatuated with him but all he wanted was friendship. For over a year Max accepted all her invitations until she wanted more. And maybe he shouldn’t have given her that one rose on March 8th. He wanted more too but didn’t want her to get hurt so he retreated and tried to make her go away yet she would show up before and after his classes.

Finally Max decided to be true to himself and take the risk. The risk that someone would love him even with all the horrible things he had done and still must do. He promised to make the world better and he will with someone like Aleska by his side.

Picking a chamomile bouquet of twenty one flowers, Max knocked on her door. It got answered by Nino who squealed joyfully at him and dragged him inside.

As Aleska came down the stairs Max got on his knees, “The queen of my heart therefore the queen of my universe will you be my partner for this lifetime and if you can put up with my quirks maybe forever?”


	7. The Wedding (Aleska & Max)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max encourages Aleska to write a journal entry to their future baby of Russian and other merged wedding traditions. Aleska thinks it is silly but does it.

The day before…

We went to Max’s church where the priestess and priest sanctified the rings. I was dressed in what seemed full regalia, a red ornate dress with gold details and a heavy veil was placed on head. We exchanged them in the presence of God, my sister Nino, my parents, his parents, and his best friend. You will know by now that I’m not a religious or spiritual person but I felt a pulsing powerful presence emanating from the center altar of that building and wondered how they were able to achieve that feat. That was the last time I saw him till the next day.

His family wanted to uphold the old ways and my family adored it. My love showed me the schedule that I wasn’t supposed to see but with all the excitement I forgot it.

The women in both families helped me bath in “magical charmed” waters. I tried not to laugh at the silly notion of magic nor did I care what silly concoctions they had mixed in the water to make it seem iridescent. Standing nude on a tiny white bassinet just big enough to encompass my upper body, they gently poured the “magical water” over my head as all the women slowly rubbed it onto me while the tiny amount that was left pooled at my feet.

Nino, mother, and the rest of the women in my family gasped as supposedly wrinkles disappeared from my body. My skin did seem better when I saw it in the full length mirror the women on his side brought.

Traditions say that the water I just bathed in is to be given for Max to drink. That is so unhygienic!  But what annoyed me the most was his side calling me “young princess Aleska” and him “young prince… a name I can’t pronounce” in which Max tells me that it means an old name for the sun. They also bow and curtsey which makes the rest of my family to do the same. My family thinks is funny and Max’s family takes it so seriously you would almost think it was life versus death instead of a wedding. Sigh. I will make sure you will strive to be a prime minister or president before I let you entertain such notions as prince or princess.

This morning

Nino told me that my parents had bought a whole new bedroom set and placed it in our new apartment. Max your father insisted that we sell our homes and move into a small pair bonding space, one bedroom apartment, to save for our future. I agreed, imagining us spending time studying our favorite subjects and discussing our favorite books together. It has been only one day and I can’t believe I miss him. I was so distracted by my feelings that I missed part of Nino’s story telling me about our family cleaning and priest(ess) blessing our room.

Also it was weird that in this day and age they held two separate pre-wedding parties; one at my parents’ house where I wait impatiently and one at his parents’ house.

I was surprised when his mother came into my room, all that bowing made me nervous that I bowed back to her. She bowed full body to the floor in response to my bowing. So annoying! None of these silly superstitious rituals make any sense to me. Yet I love him and if bathing in magical waters, praying to invisible beings in the sky, and doing other silly things makes his family and turn him happy then I’ll try to have a better attitude.

His mother helped me get into bigger more ornate red dress. It was shinny and it almost seemed like a Hindi dress instead of a Russian one. Your grandma, my mother braided my hair into one braid. Then a red veil, which was heavier than the last one, in the front was like a beaded curtain. I like things to be practical and this dress is anything but practical. A civil ceremony at a government building would have made me happy.

It was finally twilight. Even though I wasn’t supposed to, I watched from the upstairs window as the procession was getting near my childhood home. His parents’ must be high to have all the lights in the streets dimmed and all our neighbors waiting as if it were the old tsar coming to pay a visit.

From afar I saw the flames of multiple candles burning blue cyan, so those aren’t real candles, followed by the main priest and priestess holding together the pole of a huge cross with wings. Then his whole family of over two hundred in four lines, four people holding hands, by order of age. The tiny toddlers walking while the children helped from behind and as they got to the main family heads his both sets of grandparents threw silver looking coins to the crowds. Finally I saw Max sitting on a bear and his best friend the best man walking beside him.

When in front of my childhood home, Max saw that I saw him, smiling he winked at me. After unmounting, he and his friend bowed in the four directions before entering my parents’ house.

My little one there are so many details in this wedding that if you want to know them all, you can ask your auntie Nino. I write this for you because Max your father insisted to show you that you are wanted and loved by everyone. Your father says that there will come a time when you will not believe him and that you will not believe me either. I scoff at such negative thoughts but he says he is being a realist.

I know that I don’t sound that motherly yet and I think it is silly to write to you, our baby when we haven’t been married or been that intimate with each other. Your grandma and your auntie Nino thought it was a great idea because according to them and most people, marriage is for begetting children.

Back to the pre-wedding celebrations, Nino broke one huge circle loaf of bread your great grandmas baked together to feed everyone; it supposed to mean that we are all one family now. And one big wheel of cheese that the farms your father’s family owns produced. He said that milk all over Russian and all over the continent made up that wheel of cheese. I think it is ridiculous to waste transportation, fuel, and time for such a thing but feeling my surprise at such a waste he explained to me that it is to represent the unification of humanity. He is such a dreamer.

My mother-in-law asked permission from my parents to comb my hair. It was explained that the one braid would be separated into two to signify being married. Your dad had grown his hair too and my mother made his one braid into two too. I looked into his eyes while our hair was being braided and knew I made the right decisions. When the braiding was finished, we were showered with money and poppy seeds.

Our parents blessed us one more time, held our hands our fathers holding our right hand and our mothers holding our left hands, to bring us outside to a carriage that had been decorated with different flowers. Only the two of us traveled to his church in the middle of the wilderness. Everyone else will join us in the morning.

I gazed at him through the red veil and the red beads. Smiling he gazed back at me and told me how much he loved me in between kissing my hands. Silly tradition says I am to keep silent till after the main wedding ceremony and I did well during that ride.

Unlike the one in the city which is made of stone, he tells me this church in the middle of the grassland is made entirely of wood not one single piece of metal in its structure. Your father’s family patronizes many churches of many denominations.

When the carriage stopped he stepped out. I followed and off the carriage step he carried me into the church and into the left wing where I will be sleeping. It’s going to be weird sleeping in a church at least the different wood smells are pleasant. Also there isn’t any electricity out here and I’m writing this by candle light.

The door to my room opened and it was your father. He wasn’t supposed to see me until after the crowning main wedding ceremony tomorrow or was it after everyone came into our bedroom to give us gifts and blessings? Your father’s family is odd.

He said he will never ever mention it again and that I shouldn’t write this down but I want a record of it for when he or I lose our minds. I should tell him no and that I changed my mind about marrying him. Yet I still love him even after all his crazy ramblings that he has murder billions of beings. I’m getting ahead of myself. Maybe I’ll rip this part out and burn it later…

My Max said he came to tell me the full truth. Get this my future baby… just writing “future baby” down is so odd. This whole day has made my mind mush and his ranting didn’t help. I can’t believe I’m writing this down or if anyone will believe me.

Your father, your father says he wasn’t born on Earth. Breaking my silly bow of silence, I asked him if he was an alien. And what did he answer? He said we’re all aliens… that all humans are aliens. I thought he was joking and laughed it off by saying to abduct me in his spaceship. He didn’t think that was funny at all. Replying to my joke, he said he hopes I never see the inside of a spaceship and that he and his people would do everything possible to keep me off one.

“Your people?” I asked.

“Yes, my family members aren’t by bloodlines but my colleagues. They are my people.” He let out a sigh. “Aleska, I love you with all my being and I want you to know the true me, what I have done, and must do before I can truly ask you to be my life partner, my wife.”

“I don’t care what you have done in the past. I only want to know of our future.”

“My love… to know the future we must know the past for the past is the future.”

“Stop speaking in riddles and don’t excuse it by saying it is quantum biology, mechanics, physics, whatever. Say it as simple as possible.”

“I will say it in mathematical equations but you won’t believe them or how advance we are. Speak to your sister in the morning if you still want to know… Maybe… maybe it is better that you don’t know now but instead we will tell you when the universe is better for everyone.”

“Our world but us, you and me, and our family first then the world,” I corrected him.

 “Yes, when I have paid my penance against all the lives I have taken; The BILLIONS of LIVES that have enhanced mine.”

“Oh! You’re a remorse omnivore an ex-vegan who would rather live off the air and sun. My sister Nino did that for a while. It’s ok Max, my love, we can be vegetarians but that won’t stop the others from eating meat. It’s just how the world works the bigger predators eat the prey a few of the herd.” Oh that was the wrong thing to say because he kneeled beside me and cried.

I added “and if my sister accepts you then this conversation can wait for later. I trust my sister even when her version of reality doesn’t match actual reality.”

After what seemed a long time he stopped crying to tell me “I want your acceptance and if you do accept me, this will be the last time I will say anything that the general population would rather not know except in fairy tales to prepare our little one.”

“I accept you just as you are Maximilian Jones or whoever you are, I love you!”

“Please, Aleska my love, sleep on it for tomorrow there will be no turning back. I promise that if you say yes, my people will protect you. My people will be your people. To be one loving family that live for serving and balancing the universe… our world.”

“Yes, my people will be your people also. And yes that is what I want to help with applied math and its applications to modern life we can change our country and maybe the world.”

He smiled and was relieved by my words, “we will change the face of the universe.”

I laughed at him retorting, “I will be glad just to change the world.”

Your father tucked me into bed and sang your song. Remembering what he and Nino said of it, that certain tribes consider the day of a baby’s conception not when the parents got together but when the child was first conceived in the mind of the mother. The child in spirit would sing the song to the mother, the mother would teach it to the father, and then to the child’s village.

Well my little one, your father is more feminine than I and I’m more masculine take charge kind of lady.  So he heard it first. He tells me you will be a fierce like a lioness of a girl. I let them, him and Nino, have their fun. I told him to stop Nino with her superstitious astrology instead they encourage each other with their silliness. Still I am excited to hear his song being sung by his family members before the crowning wedding part of the ceremony.

  
Maximilian’s song: time machine – stone language  
  
“I dream of days without end and long for sleep without fear.  
I hope to walk through the night and know this will come true.  
  
I dream of life lived long and full, and long to see our children grow. I hope for better days to come and know that they will come soon.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have the whole wedding but I don't know if it is fun or boring for you all so next chapter will skip that and go to where Aleska is already pregnant a few days before Max leaves us.


	8. Conception (Aleska & Max)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jupiter's song, The celebration ceremony Max would say it is to bring her home...

Your conception day

We took the day off dressing in white and sang your song all day to call your soul home. I sang it in Russian and he sang it in his language.

Wandering child of the Earth  
Do you know just how much you’re worth?  
You have walked this path since your birth  
You were destined for more

There are those who’ll tell you you’re wrong  
They will try to silence your song  
But right here is where you belong  
So don’t search anymore

(Chorus)  
You are the dawn of a new day that’s waking  
A masterpiece in the making  
The blue in an ocean of grey  
You are right where you need to be  
Poise to inspire and to succeed  
You’ll look back and you’ll realize one day

In your eyes there is doubt  
As you try to figure it out  
But that’ not what life is about  
So have faith there’s a way

Though the world may try to define you  
It can’t take the light that’s inside you  
So don’t dare try to hide  
Let your fears fade away  
Chorus x2”  
Wanderer’s Lullaby by Adriana Figueroa

All our family is excited and mine thinks he is heaven sent and that we will make great parents.

I was asleep when your father waited up to greet the day, sun on the farthest opposite point from being highest in our sky, saying a prayer in his language which he says is older than the Sumerians. Of course I don’t believe it’s older than the Sumerians but he believes it and we don’t have any way to verify his claim so I let it go. His spiritual group counts a day from the darkest time to the brightest time; meaning that light will always win over dark. I’m supposed to ask Nino to write down for you something about Earth’s position compared to the sun, other planets, and galaxies.

Being with him has made me believe in something greater than all of us. Yes, your mom the pragmatist is starting to waver on her stance. I think any atheist will change their minds when being embraced by his… our group. Describing the feelings I feel when I’m with them won’t do them justice. My tears are making the ink smudge. I love them and I love you my daughter even though I haven’t met you yet.

He has made me believe that he knows you. I told him to stop the reincarnation sayings since I’m not ready to hear it yet and instead tell Nino, who eats every word he says. Sometimes I wonder if he should be with your aunt instead of me. He assures me that we belong together, fulfilling a spiritual contract, and that Nino is just helping me as his backup if he has to work; for when you want answers to questions I can’t or don’t want to answer. WORK. He talks as if his work is his life. Not the work at the university but the work our spiritual group does together.

They stayed up all night making preparations and saying prayers while your father and I slept. Other couples have gone through this ceremony too. The positivity of the group makes it fun with the many celebrations of the small accomplishments.

A few hours before dawn a horse drawn carriage picked us up from our apartment taking us to the same field we were married. They avoid technology during ceremonies but they aren’t a hippy group because during work they are at the forefront of technology in our country.

It’s raining and thundering as we leave the carriage. Getting rained on, your father and I walk barefooted towards the field. I see them all dressed in white twirling with their pointy hats. If you were a bird and looked down upon them it would be as if they were planets twirling round and round while at the same time following another circular pattern.

They part and all bow playing the royal game again. When we get to the center instead of being a circular rug there is a white floor that seems to be made of ivory. It has mathematical equations some I understand but most are probably what your father calls quantum physics biology which I scoff at since there is no such thing.

When I step onto the floor, I am surprise it isn’t slippery and that it is warm. I couldn’t count how many people where bowing to us. Later I found out that many leaders from spiritual centers everywhere came for our celebration of you. It made me feel like a queen. I was surprise but shouldn’t have been when the front circle row stood up I saw your aunt Nino who put her palms together and nodded at me.

In the center your father Max kneeled to kiss my stomach. I felt awkward when everyone else kneeled and I was left standing. The warm rain felt wonderful. And now thinking about it the rain should have been cold.

Everyone sang in that language while your father said some words that he wrote for you. See silver insert.

Lullaby by Loreena McKennitt includes a poem by William Blake

“O for a voice like thunder and a tongue to drown the throat of war!  
When the senses are shaken, and the soul is driven to madness, who can stand?  
When the souls of the oppressed fight in the trouble air that rages, who can stand?  
When the whirlwind of fury comes from the Throne of God,  
When the frowns of his countenance drive the nations together, who can stand?  
When Sin claps his broad wings over the battle, and sails rejoicing in the flood of Death;  
When souls are torn to everlasting fire, and fiends of Hell rejoice upon the slain, O who can stand?  
O who hath caused this? O who can answer at the Throne of God?  
The kings and nobles of the land have done it!  
Hear it not, Heaven, thy Ministers have done it!”

Wow, it was so beautiful and they way the sung it sounded like a song of hope but I just read it now and found out it’s about WAR?!

The rain stopped and the before dawn sky became full of stars like I had never seen before. It was as if I could almost touch the stars. The sky is full of miracles!

They stood as one and sang your song in their language as they all whirled together including your aunt Nino. Your father whirled around me, while three other beautiful radian young ladies I hadn’t seen before whirled in a complicated pattern around us. I was later introduced to them only by their last name since they were representing their family and not themselves; Dunlevy, Kepler, and Basilides.

That night your father and I became one. He says we became four that God’s grace and creativity brought you to us. No one will ever know me deeper in mind, body, and soul than your father. I love him with all my being and I hope that you will find the happiness I have when it’s your turn. You can think me crazy but I felt your quickening.

Your aunt Nino told me that some religions think the soul enters a month after conception, some right after birth, I think it was at that moment, yet your father says that part of your soul was hovering near us right after our wedding. Nino told me to write that part down.

You are my love. You are my life. All that we do it is for you.


	9. Run A New Life (Aleska)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max spoiling Aleska? Why run and a new friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter Jupiter & Friends followed by NR-Not Rated Chapters could be M or WTF?

Your father spoils me by taking me to the spa every week since your conception. I share a soothing bath with the other pregnant ladies of the group. We receive great nutrition and vitamin shots for us and for our babies, you. He keeps trying to make me postpone my work till I have you but I promised myself to work till you are at least six months.

I was fearful they were going to hurt you when they stuck those big needles onto my uterus and your developing self. They showed me Agouti mice studies, epigenetics trials, and some secret human trials that our government is supposedly running to make super humans. I laughed at the last part yet the science is referenced and makes sense to me. Your father gives us a vitamin c shot in the morning it gives both of us energy, small doses of trace minerals in the afternoon, and a vitamin b complex at night before bed for helping repair my cells and help yours develop to your highest potential.

Your father has an obsession with the telescope I gave him as a present and has done so many modifications that I don’t understand. We can see really close to planets as if it was a satellite passing by and tells me that important information for his work is hidden in it.

My favorite part of our daily rituals is when he massages my belly, your current home, and talks to you as if you where already here and could talk. He hates the petroleum jelly but that’s what I like instead of the non-petro lotion that he likes so we take turns.

\--

This will be my last entry. I have written everything from our wedding to now and your aunt Nino wants me to burn it. I almost did; good thing the fire wasn’t ready and only messed up the back cover. How can I write this?

Your father is gone… or as his group would have said ascended to his next life. I don’t feel anything. And now instead of mourning with our families I must leave and go into hiding to the states. Nino and the new group members say it’s for your protection that there’s a century old vendetta out against you. I try to ask questions but they won’t answer me. It is crazy that I must leave everything behind and sneak in without paperwork into a country that doesn’t want any more immigrants. I’m taking this book with me so that you may know your parents’ history together and as he said to know that you are loved by many.

Nino tells me that only three are alive of all the people who came to your conception celebration. I remembered when he was paranoid telling me a city in the U.S. and to just drop everything and go. Now Nino and I have to escape to disappear away from the group when we make it to New York only on words he told me right after your conception; words that he only said to me. I know Nino will believe me. This will be the first time I do something that is so opposite of my personality. I trust you Maximilian Jones. I trust you who ever you were, my love.

\--

Life keeps going and sometimes we forget the past. I wanted to forget about this book. I wanted to forget about a life I would never be able to have. Your aunt Nino and I must live in the shadows to protect you. After so long, I write in this book… your book because of what happened today but as usual I get ahead of myself when it comes to emotional things my mind becomes jelly.

The Dunlevy’s were the emergency persons that your father had for us. You and their little girl have become close friends or the closes person you let near you. We clean the houses of all the members and employees of a separate branch of your father’s spiritual group. Also that none know that I was your father’s wife and that you were born within their ranks. Mrs. Dunlevy said other things that were so absurd I don’t even remember it.

They told Nino and I that for now we should all pretend we are poor immigrants who just clean houses and need a leg up in society but she assures me that Max left us all the resources needed for anything you would ever need. She emphasized NEED and that you are supposed to learn the difference between need and want. I got angry at her that day when she told me that you need to learn how to be grateful. You a baby learn to be grateful? A baby is grateful for everything. I wanted to slap her for insulting you but then remembered that she is protecting us from vindictive family members. Mrs. Dunlevy still won’t tell me why.

Right after you turned five, I was happy to find my cousin who has cut off ties with the other part of our family over who knows what but I’m glad for family. Not caring what the Dunlevy’s think, we move in with them; we need our family. The Dunlevy’s were ecstatic when I told them we three would have to share a room together in my cousin’s house. You were not happy at all but it was necessary as it gave us the opportunity to show you that family is more important than things or having your own room.

Now back to why I’m back to embracing our past and writing in this book. The members are not supposed to know who we are that’s what the Dunlevy’s told me. Yet yesterday our first day at an eccentric single mom’s home, we overstayed our welcome since she doesn’t want her daughter to associate with people she hasn’t approved. The way she talked to me before we took the job was extremely disrespectful but as punishment for moving out of their control err the house the Dunlevy’s had for us they only give us rude people to work for. Their work pays a lot more than cousin Vassily and we don’t have to share.

This lady’s house is adorable and cozy the total opposite of how she treats us. The good thing about it was that the single mom gave you permission to play with her daughter’s books and toys which included a portable planetarium in the attic playroom if not I would have turn this job down no matter how much the pay per hour. Also since she likes things perfect she is the only one who pays per hour all the other houses are one set fee.  

The single mother came home at the set time with her nine year old daughter in tow. I saw her and bowed my head to apologize. She ignored me and in Hebrew, may be thinking I don’t know it, said to her daughter, “Do you remember the bees?”

“Yes, mother.”

“Well there are drones around the house today. Ignore them so that they may finish their tasks.”

Well I knew the lady saw us, immigrants as animals and now had the proof. Right then and there I wanted us to leave and finish a week from now. I went to the bathroom upstairs to calm down before I would say something I may regret later.

When I came out, I saw that instead checking if the window sills and outlets are clean, you were playing with the planetarium. But what shocked me was that the nine year old kneeled and bowed before you. She was crying and you where the one ignoring her since the six year you were still mesmerized by the stars projected onto the ceiling.

You saw me and I pointed down till you finally saw her.

“Why are you crying?” you asked her.

Instead of answering she hugged you and you hugged her back. I was amazed because you hate people touching you and we’ve been working on that with our family.

It was the first time you smiled at another person since we moved in with my cousin. Your tantrums and silent treatment have lasted weeks. I finally saw your pessimistic attitude disappear. Something had changed in you.

I closed the door praying that her mother will stay downstairs. Later you talked to your second cousin about you being a VIP meaning a Very Important Person in the universe that you are an angel from heaven and that’s why it’s hard to follow the rules here since the rules don’t apply to you.

Kiddo you made my day. I will show that prejudice lady to give everyone a chance. Letting your aunt Nino teach you Russian, Hebrew, and Spanish as she wanted you to learn, I now acquiesce to her teaching you anything she wants; including the past that still hurts and that I don’t want to remember.

Jupiter my daughter I love you unconditionally. There is nothing you have to do or don’t do, say or don’t say, but just be the best you and yes even the worst you. I’m here for you.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Identical DNA mice one is diabetic/anxious and the other healthy/relaxed  
> "What happens in the womb can last a lifetime"  
> http://www.beginbeforebirth.org/the-science/epigenetics


	10. Jupiter and Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jupiter's somewhat life reflection and a risky rescue adventure

* * *

Sitting on a bench next to the principal’s office, Jupiter thinks for the twentieth time today I hate my life. She tries to reflect on her actions, her friends, and life in general not because she wants to but because her friend told her to write things down as to speak to her higher-self that it will make her feel better and not be as depressed.

‘I hate my life that is what I think every day since I could remember. I don’t want to be here. I feel as I have been tricked every time I open my eyes finding myself in a nightmare. Ok, so I don’t know what my life is supposed to be but I sure know it shouldn’t be like this.

Going to school, working to help my family and doing homework it isn’t too much it just seems useless. It seems as if I’m a hamster in an exercise wheel stupidly thinking that I’m going somewhere but in reality I have been running in the same spot the whole time wasting my energy. Despising getting up at stupid o’clock in the morning to take the public bus to boring school, the only thing that keeps me from leaving this place is the love my mother feels for me. She would be devastated. The admiration of my aunt Nino who teaches me all the fairy tales and stories my father told her. And yes! :: rolls eyes :: My crazy family, yes yes even annoying uncle Vassily and obnoxious second cousin Valdie.

But most important my best friends: My naïve very frivolous friend Katherine who lives in privilege reality. My snobby bossy yet endearing friend Diana who goes to the same private school Kat does but the best part is her family pays my family so we can have days off.  Otherworldly Camilla who understands my feelings of hating to be here for she hates loves to be here also.

“The Goddess” Diana is a true Scorpio with some Cancer tendencies. Katherine and she used to be good friends but now they seem to be frenemies. She won’t tell me why and I dislike it when she talks over my head which sometimes I think she does on purpose. It’s ok because two people at a time are already enough for me. I like one on one time better and big crowds make me uneasy. I don’t understand why since I was born in the house of Leo the lion the sign who loves crowds the most, who thinks they are the creator themselves, but I do have the lion quality that wants to please other people. I don’t like it that they seemed to have drifted apart. It scares me that it may happen to me that we my friends and family will not be with me but become zombies’ bodies that are just there and are empty. I have such ridiculous thoughts and fears that I surprise myself.

Katherine is a Libra and her nickname used to be Kat but she doesn’t want to be called that anymore. She was my first friend. My mother tells me her family was and is still very kind to our family. They where our anchor when we came into the United States. Unlike my other friends, she’s a girly girl and her conversations are mostly about fashion, movies, the latest trend, and family. Just an ordinary privileged girl which is refreshing after hanging out with Diana and or Kami which is like being in a non boring school full time.

Camilla “Kamikaze Jane” because she doesn’t know when to keep her mouth shut and stands up for everything and everyone. A Pisces who acts more like an Aries; it is tiring to watch her. Transferred from the private school just to be with me her mother was disappointed. She’s hilarious getting up at stupid o’clock with me and taking the bus together. She tells me she meditates on the car ride over to my house. She gave me the nickname “planet” because I’m my own planet not part of Earth I don’t like it I rather be called Jupe. Katherine calls me Jupe but Diana knowing that it annoys me calls me planet Jupiter. Oh Kami is the friend who said to write things down for it helps her as her parents act like zombies drones all the time only caring about work and status. She hopes that it will help me too and that I will realize later when I’m older that what I think is life and death now will be funny later.

I’m supposed to write why I don’t want to be here and the good things of being here but I rather not. The admin secretary just gave me a look of pity I don’t know why since it’s a planned visit to the principal’s office not that we are in trouble. Kami is attempting to give part of her trust fund, some sort of savings account, money to the performing arts department of our school so you would think the secretary would be happy.’

Jupiter looks up to see the art teacher, music teacher, and the few students who can stay after school. That’s when her red AOL messenger device, first ever text to text anywhere web or device, tells her there’s a message. It’s Kami telling her to let the people in. She guesses that teachers can’t interrupt a meeting but that students like her can so Jupiter opens the principal’s office door.

Jupiter hears the principal say, “… your mother will have my head on a platter if I dare accept the money that’s supposed to go to your college education”

Kami retorts, “The money is to be used for education. Music and Art are important forms of education. It’s in cash and can’t be traced why are you not accepting it?”

Jupiter walks right behind Kami as the principal passes her a note which has a crude simple picture that seems to be a camera that’s when Kami gets angry crumbling the note. So plan B now goes into action. Jupiter puts a clipboard down that has a paper with a petition written and spaces for people to sign donating money to the cause. This will keep the program afloat till they can do more to get the rest of community involved if they aren’t already but they haven’t found those people yet.

Planet Jupiter takes out five twenty dollar bills and signs her name onto the sheet. The rest of the people, students and teachers, also do the same thing. Unbeknown to the principal, Jupiter and Kami came up with a plan that gave certain amount of money to each person teacher or student that are trustworthy, pay them for their time, and a schedule of people coming to give the money to the office slow enough to not cause any suspicion. Jupiter was surprise at herself for being great at managing all those factors of people, money, and time for it to seem random.

The first stage of the plan was executed perfectly. Kami and Jupiter leave the school in high spirits. Jupiter is surprise that an SUV Service Utility Vehicle is waiting for them, since Kami despises those things. A cute guy their age dressed in camouflage gets out opening the backdoor for the friends.

Once in the vehicle, Kami introduces them the female adult driver a PETA People for Ethical Treatment of Animals member, her son a teen member, and another boy. Kami warns them not to say anything about Concentrated Animal Feeding Operations CAFO’s to Jupiter that she doesn’t like to hear it and that it truly makes her physically ill. She should have known better but at least gave the PETA people the chance to respect other people’s boundaries.

“Please don’t, I get enough from Kami,” Said Jupiter.

“But of course not mademoiselle just wanted to offer you a chance to free some pregnant dairy cows from a life of misery. Instead of going out to the movies tonight we like to help beings that can’t defend themselves and bring them to sanctuary.”

“We are taking her home because it’s on the way nothing more,” Kami retorted.

Jupiter angry at Kami for making the decision for her says, “Yes! I would like to help save them.”

“Atlantic Ocean” Kami retorts but Planet Jupe is so annoyed that she doesn’t listen. She’s tired of people making decisions’ for her or when Kami and Diana treat her like their child.

Giving Kami that begging-puppy-dog face Planet Jupe says, “I want to make a difference to that one starfish.”

“Fine, if we get caught we’ll have to hire the best lawyers. Mama Aleska isn’t going to like it and my mother will blame you for it.” Kami realized she made a mistake and instigated Planet into reacting instead of thinking things through. And since in the past she has told Jupiter all the horrible things cows face in these factories Kami feels responsible for Planet wanting to help.

“We have done over two hundred rescue missions with one hundred percent success. So no lawyers are needed. I would care more what Miss LaClear your mom would say about your activities with us, Miss Camilla,” said the mom.

“Must I always remind you to call me Kami and let go of the miss title we are all the same,” Kami always gets annoyed at such titles unless it’s used when pretending or re-enacting history.

Planet calls her mother to tell her that she will be spending the night with Kami. They get to a dairy factory out in what seems the middle of nowhere. Kami already knows that the PETA people have spies as employees on the inside that will help with the operation and will seem like computer, gates, and other malfunctions at what seems random intervals’ over the past year that have been happening ever so often with their help. Being on a few of these new moon rescue missions usually going into the factory or useless products research labs, Kami is glad that this will be her last one and was able to share the experience with Jupiter.  After dressing themselves in camouflage and putting on night goggles, Planet Jupe and Kami are to wait outside therefore not trespassing as the cows run on the dirt road and through the wilderness. They are only taking a small percentage of the pregnant cows the biggest will be the new cows that just came that day. Also keep the number just low enough to force the company to rethink its business strategy as former employees left a new plan for slowly making the changes necessary to make the dairy factory more humane and profitable.

There’s three people on each team, each has a camouflage modified truck hidden in the wilderness zone between trees that carries two cows, and able to disperse easily to different sanctuaries as necessary. Planet and Kami wait patiently by the side of the dirt road till they hear the cow stampede.

They are able to load their first cow into the truck but by the time they get their second cow they were warned that the police was coming and since they are the last ones they will see them first. They were able to get the last cow in and hid in the truck turning it off in the middle of the wildrness zone and the truck has ingenious devices that cover its tracks. The adult lady that was with them laughed and said we’re busted but they won’t find us unless they bring their full arsenal and bloodhounds that are extraordinary because our gear was sprayed with scent deterrents and that’s why they are wearing gloves and head gear.

Four police vans and five police cars were sent in because unbeknown to Kami and Planet Jupe the main leader wanted credit for all the past heists and improvements to factories. The main leader had asked prominent people’s teens across the country to take part in this one to create more acknowledgement of their work. Also the parent company of the dairy factory started putting up plastic orange fences surrounding the area with the help of the main prominent family as soon as the system rebels entered.

The officers knowing the group’s protocol only had to take each truck one by one also for the group not to fight the officers. Following orders from the main company the officers left Planet Jupe and Kami’s truck alone. Only after all the other people were taken into custody and things settled, leaving for the police station, did two off duty female officers came with flashlights.

During the commotion Jupiter was relocated successfully to where the cows were in the back of the truck and was hiding calmly petting one to calm down. So when the officers hit the side of the truck and yelled to get out, Planet Jupe was still just thinking about the poor cows having to go back instead of her survival.

The adult woman followed all orders while Kami wanted to fight but she had to think of Jupiter when one of the officers slammed the woman against the truck for what looked to her as no reason at all. But when the officer assigned to her did the same she knew something was not right. Did mother know and had orchestrated this? They were both handcuffed.

After being verbally assaulted which Kami didn’t mind since she can take that from the officers that have to put up with so little pay and the rest of the abused population. Also because she knows that her family has never paid reparations for their ancestors past mistakes. They were dragged to near the car. The woman was put in the back seat.

Kami was pushed onto the dirt road and the lady officers each had a foot on her back. She was just waiting to hear her mother’s voice on how disappointed she was with her behavior. But was surprise when she heard Diana’s voice, “Did you learn your lesson yet? …Or do you need a stay in prison?”

Now Kami was angry and wanted to spit out that it was jail not prison and that a simple fine will take care of this misunderstanding. Instead she replied, “I haven’t done anything wrong. We all belong to Earth equally.” Meaning the Earth belongs to everyone equally.

“I thought we were pass the trespassing, property theft, and being an eco terrorist? Those who go against the system don’t fare well Camilla Aeon LaClear. Instead put all this extra energy into starting a non-profit or something more seemingly useful,” Diana angrily replied.

 Remembering scared in the truck and the crazy process she might be put through just because she was brought in as a baby, Kami acquiesced “Ok I promise no more crossing arbitrary imaginary lines made by the 0.0002% I’ll try to behave like mother wants me to behave.” And in Chinese, “The little mermaid is in the truck.”

Furious Diana replied in back in Chinese, “So you had to drag other people down, other people who you profess to help, and is this how you help them?” while she let the officers know they were dismissed by saying in English, “Thank you ladies.” They finally got their feet off Kami.

“You were so going to go for that police car ride!” Diana laughed at Kami.

“I have a suspicion; do you have a GPS Global Position Satellite location device on me?” Kami asked as they both walked through the wilderness buffer zone to get to the truck Jupiter was waiting.

“The top leader of your little group is a friend of the family and had so much fun with you little people. But since you’re my responsibility and my best friend it would have been a bad mark on my record,” Diana feeling exasperated by the change of plans. She didn’t think herself cruel and wasn’t going to let a bystander get hurt in her power games especially a bystander she is fond of.

When they opened the truck they both yelled, “hey Jupe it’s us!”

Jupiter was relieved and happy. She hugged Diana and asked Camilla, “Did you call her?”

“No, she showed up all by herself knowing I was going to be here because the person who blabbed is a friend of her family.” She didn’t want Jupiter to know that it was the main leader which would make her friend more depressed. That would make her lose her faith in people.

Concerned Jupiter asked, “What about Margaritka (Daisy) and Tyul’pan (Tulip)?”

Good grief she named them, Diana thought. Laughing internally Camilla thought I dare you to be heartless in front of such an angel.

Sighing Diana gave in, “I’ll buy them and they can be taken to a sanctuary.”

“What about the rest of them? Can they come too?” Jupiter asked innocently.

“They go back. You’re in trouble and instead of saying thank you for saving you from jail and who knows what else… you want me to set loose all these animals? These animals provide nutrition for many humans just because Kami and other ignorant humans, who wish to be prey instead of predator ignoring their nature, filled your head with nonsense doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do.  None of this will make a difference in the grand scheme of things. As I said to Kami, instead of causing trouble why not create a nonprofit company to work side by side with corporations.”

Jupiter hated lecturing Diana, “Thank you oh great goddess Diana. May we discuss this later for I want to take them now to see with my own eyes that they are free? You can drive us and it can be a girls’ road trip!” Because when Jupiter knows what she wants, which is rare, she always gets it.

Mischievously smiling Diana replied in Chinese for Jupiter to practice, “Sure why not?!” and in German for Kami, “That way we can all practice our different languages”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have the whole thing of the car ride, when they get to the sanctuary, and consequences for both Jupiter and Camilla but it doesn't move the plot along. It's a slice of life Jupiter the Empath fan-girly part. Only posting if someone wants to read that ;) 
> 
> Next is Squee! the original beginning of this story which is T but some people may think it more...


	11. Mistake encounter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lord Balem must check on his mother's experiments.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For you eGuest from FanFictionNet; posted here better edited because of you. Ignobilis, I'm still horrible at third person LOL. For everyone else it will be explained later why the Out Of Character and how come Jupiter's DNA wasn't caught on till then. Also, I hate stupid villains and prefer more omniscient omnipotent misunderstood ones like Darth Vader/Anakin and Megamind. Jupiter and Caine fangirl-ing later. Jupiter will always be the Queen Bee ;)

**"If you're flawless, then you'll win my love… With everything I do for you, The least you can do is keep quiet… How long before YOU SCREW IT UP!" Perfect by Alanis Morissette**

The luxury interstellar ship in orbit around the First Primary of House Abrasax alcazar home base planet right before the wormhole jump to Earth; Lord Balem’s spiritual advisor Ki (named by Lady Kalique as Ker a general term for Greek spirit sprites) runs towards him. She is without her station robes, without her painted face, and without any of the formulas on her body for she is going against her duties and against the Orous Commonwealth Board’s wishes.

Being rational didn’t work so now she hopes her years of service will speak of the trust they have when she supplicates for him not go to Earth that he can still do his duty virtually just as he has trained his new Earth security.

Contrary to popular belief, Lord Balem deplores being near weak people who beg for they are emotionally unstable and can’t be reasoned with and therefore not much of a challenge. He is disappointed when Ki did such a thing for she doesn’t understand that he has to go. There’s a lot at stake in that planet were more than a fourth of the population is under Abrasax Research & Development’s absolute control. Worse of all they don’t know how many of mother’s adherents and anti-regenx adherents are left.

Ki doesn’t give up, making an unauthorized call to Lady Kalique the Second Primary of House Abrasax as soon as they are close to Earth for his sister seems to care more about him than profits or so it seems. Unbeknown to Ki, it was Lady Kalique who suggested that Lord Balem faces his past and makes peace with that project. Mother’s oldest confidant Lady Basilides and Lady Kalique went to visit the Abrasax matriarch’s resting place less than thirty years ago and Lady Kalique was able to have peace. When the spiritual elders think Lord Balem and the universe are ready for a recurrence she will be ready to receive her mother with open arms.

“Most high, Brother I'm concerned over your well being" Lady Kalique says in apprehension over FTL.

In complete confidence "I'm the same as always. Kalique."

She seems afraid when speaking the next words, "Four of Entitleds have become allies to compete against us."

"I'm aware of the change. Don't sabotage their efforts and let them think they can dare to compete against us. Let the public talk all they want including our own worker drones.  We Abrasax have technology in our possession that will make the current systems obsolete and stop the ReGenX-E black market. After Earth's newest harvest not even all the combined Entitleds will ever be able to compete with Abrasax ReGenX-E quality.  I’m here to make sure all goes as Mother originally planned."

He turns and let her see that his ship close to Earth's orbit. She is overjoyed, sheds tears saying, "Yes, small timed slow exposure till the feelings go away. I'm here for anything that you need or desire, Brother." She bows her head and he dismisses her by cutting the connection.

Looking out his cathedral windows he is lost in thought, ‘Remembering how much mother loved this planet makes me ill, I detest it but since it yields the best profits even with its extra factors, I must personally oversee those extra adjustments.

I resent that Earth has set the standard to judge all others. Just the samples of ReGenX-E from Earth exceed all other profits in the market. Glad that for security reasons the Entitled don’t know what planets the batches come from. Yet, every time I check on this experiment, I can't think, and I feel like burning the planet's surface to the ground slowly destroying them all.

There's only one place I abhor more than earth and that is Jupiter's Refining station. It unsettles me in such a way that I lose track of time, so I try to avoid thinking about "that refinery station" unless necessary.’ His medical program on his FTL lets him know he needs to relax or distract himself.  He does so by reviewing his last, almost perfect, harvest knowing that she will be proud.

Lord Balem Abrasax contemplates work in general. For most planets he feels pleasure, pride and satisfaction of estimating results from a combination of pre-harvest loss, gathering loss, and machine loss thus ensuring that a crop reaches its highest capacity for growth, it's both a science and an art that he enjoys.

Experiments on Earth have successfully shown that Orousian humanoid DNA can be merged with Cro-Magnon from Sirius and Neanderthal, the natives of this galaxy, and other human species for faster growth and an easier controlled crop that produces ReGenX-E with the highest purity by importing enough Orousian female hybrids to keep the valuable mitochondrial DNA (mtDNA) intact.

Just being near Earth, the center of Lord Balem’s gravity gets pulled towards that planet. It makes him think and feel what he doesn’t want to remember, ‘Mother used to bring me here promising this planet’s richest only to me. The wonderful yet awful memories this place harbors. Why did she love this planet more than me? She did fulfill her promises to me except for that one system, which she called the prototype, that Lady Kalique and I must share together in its problems.’

Lord Balem’s entourage lets Earth’s magistrate know that it’s time to give an update on all projects. The First Primary with his eight business assistants reviews all that he can on a secure local connection but some projects can only be discuss on the planet’s surface per his mother’s guidelines.

\--

CantignyGardens, Chicago  
On the public side it is 500 acre estate garden and an experimental farm, which served as a working laboratory, has tried new species of crop plants, tested theories of planting and harvesting, and investigated new practices in raising productive farm animals. Underground the garden is a node hive for Abrasax Industries.

She’s late as usual, hoping her guard friend will still let her sneak in, she ran towards one of the garden's service entrance while dialing for her insignificant-rule-breaking partner in crime, a sister, and a best friend. It rings, and as usual, she gets sent to voicemail. She leaves one, even though she knows her friend doesn’t have time to listen to it, "Hey Planet where are you?"

_Reminiscing our break ins: our chemistry teacher's chemical closet, getting caught, and having to re-organize it and take inventory instead of being expelled and during summer nights breaking into our community sports center's pool with our other friends. As an only unwanted child of intellectuals my parents' colleagues their secret society friends and my school friends are really my family. She misses the fun kids' stuff they hardly get to do anymore ever since she started college and Planet has to work full time for her family_.

She calls again and again until Planet picks up.

In an apologetic voice she says, "Sorry Kami, extra work came in; you know how much we need it"

"It's alright I just wanted to hear your voice and spend time together. I miss you Planet Jupiter." She sighs disappointingly, "We'll have to come back together when and if they open it back up to the public"

"I'm really sorry Kami, I'll make it up to you. If..? I feel that your comment is pessimistic. But what I really wanted to say was 'there you go again with that pessimistic view of the world’ and I thought we were going to help each other see things in a positive way."

"Yay! What I meant is Yay Thank you for letting me know and having the courage to tell me. I will try to remember to find a positive way of looking and coming up with solutions to facts that only have negative outcomes for us. They've closed the gardens for... what seems, without reason and they haven't said when it will open." laughing "See I made it better in mid sentence because of you. Still learning. Thanks Planet!"

Jupiter laughing, "Outcomes, outcomes… Maybe, we do need to hang out more.” Then speaks in a serious tone, “I’ve been having awful nightmares and this feeling of dread lately but then extra energy and overjoyed for what seems like no reason. All of the sudden I feel as if I’m bipolar."

"I’ve been feeling that way too. Maybe there’s going to be a huge natural disaster that will help all of us renew? That’s the only thing I can guess for now. When will I be graced with your presence?"

Jupiter laughing again, "When Jupiter is in retrograde." Inside joke between the three friends and aunt Nino that means when Jupiter has free time to turn her energy inward for self reflection.

"Just remember to make work as if you where playing house, our house, and it won't be that bad. Helping them by making more time for them to spend with their family, you are making our world better. Do your best with the best intentions and the universe will give you back what you put in this lifetime and the next."

"That’s much better but you over did it with the double sugar coating! I'll try thanks. I got to go. I’ll call you later."

She sees her guard friend in the distance; he does that guy thing she can't stand. He glances at her up and down like a piece of meat. Kami thinks she can't hardly blame him since he isn't used to seeing her in a girly dress but has only seen her in business clothes while talking to the people she counsels.

Kami is still on time to get in but he argues that the new people are security freaks and doesn't want to let her in the gardens as promised. She argues back that it's 500 acres! Bribing her for a date in exchange for entrance, in case he loses his job, at least he got a date out of it. Finally in she feels elated the whole garden will be empty and she’ll be able to hear nature without a thousand human voices.

She makes her way to one of the rose gardens. After setting her phone on vibrate and storing all things in her ridiculous small leather purse backpack, a gift from the Goddess Diana to acclimate to reality, she checks for a place to lie down to view the roses and the sky at the same time. Nestled perfectly between the plants, the scent of roses mixes with her homemade honey lotion, she begins to relax.

Kami starts to meditate visualizing that she is a plant reaching towards the sky to charge its self with the sun and digging its roots deep into Earth's core. She tries to sense all the main energy cords in her body that are connected to Earth, the moon, and the sun. All of the sudden there’s that pull of gravity in her navel that feels like the despair Planet mentioned yet at the same time the pull of gravity is different on her funky physical heart, that later in life had shifted closer to the center of her body, feels absolute joy. She thinks if Jupiter is crazy then I’m crazy too and wonders what aunt Nino would say.

When a bee lands on her, she tries to forget about those conflicting feelings and focuses on the bee walking on her forehead. Because it was drinking from her tears she had to move it lower for she didn’t want to be afraid that the bee will go for her eye.

For Lord Balem this planet makes him lose his temper more than usual for typically he tortures himself working on Earth by switching back and forth on a planet he likes but this time the information is so complex he can’t take any breaks. Balem wants it to be over yet takes Lady Kalique’s suggestion. He glowers at his Inner Circle Security to disappear out of sight! As he walks through this primitive garden, remembering when his Mother talked to the terrans as if she were one of them, he calms down.

His Mother entertained herself by befriending them, giving them gifts and meals while asking how their lives have been. Laughing internally to himself, ‘it was amusing since terrans or as the average citizen calls them earth tersies, even with our best genes, are extremely ignorant compared to the rest of their holdings yet Mother liked them best.

One time she took one home and let it keep its name. It, Gurdjieff, really said insane things that they aren't the top of the food chain and other nonsense but it did make our harvests more profitable.’ His thoughts are distracted by a familiar female voice laughing "beeeee gentle." Angrily, thinking this place’s terran security would be getting replaced if he wasn't razing the place down; he slowly makes his way towards the voice.

It the female has stopped speaking and its breathing - inhaling 30 seconds, hold 8, exhaling 38, and hold 8 seconds - rather odd for a terran. Looking through the rose bushes with the stealth camera drones that surround him and are attached to his FTL, Lord Balem sees the female, wavy black hair and medium skin tone, lying on the ground without any cares while bees crawl all over its skin. Giggling it relocates the ones that land on its face to another area. For a moment he wonders if he envies the terrans’ for this stock isn’t miserable with their simple lives of just growing, eating, entertainment, working, and reproducing. NO! He tells himself to stop such ridiculous thoughts.

Getting closer, he looms over it for a better view with his own eyes. As it smiles, its eyes open showing them to be brown with specks of green and they get greener by the moment. Its pupils fully dilated more than needed for this starlight. He thinks ‘Aha (in derision), it likes me. Females instinctively are attracted to power. It passes the hive test as the imported Orousian insects seem to like it and it isn’t afraid of them.’

Kami felt the gravity on her navel pull harder and harder like a black hole of sadness messing with her meditation that she didn’t realize her physical heart was elated. She thought at that moment "there's a disturbance in the force" and smiled at her corny nerdy line.

Opening her eyes to see Lord Balem she thought he was one of those emotional depressed guys since he was dressed all in black shinny garb with an intricate silver collar as if he was cosplaying a manga character. Ugh! She thought wanting to yell at her annoying endocrine-pituitary system controlling her body for she hopes it doesn’t seem obvious she finds him physically attractive perfect androgyny of an angel with just enough masculinity to say that he is male.

She gracefully got on her feet. "Hi, I'm called Camilla LaClear born in the Milky Way galaxy's Orion's arm Sol's third rock Earth, former Maldek warrior, and Citizen of Earth, you?" hoping he would think it is funny like most of her anime and science-fiction liking friends. She extended her hand to shake his but he doesn't reciprocate.

Lord Balem did not found it amusing. It irritated him that it dared to talk to him; he should strike it down on that spot thinking, ‘How dare it thinks it can touch me!’ With work still on his mind, he judged its quality. It looked healthy with above average muscle definition but he didn’t want to think about work. Then he remembered his Mother’s musings and treated it like the rest of the objects that surrounded him.

She felt that he was scrutinizing her and was confused by the look he gave thinking, ‘I haven’t killed anyone.’ Kami saw his expression changed to a pretend bored one, except for his sad eyes. They stood there for five minutes staring at each other but it felt longer then he acted as if she was part of the landscape.  It is a good thing that she likes silence and thinking, ‘Oh we can play this game; I might as well do breathing meditation while looking at his adorable face.’ She curses the current ovulation days that make her question her judgment and now understands her guard friend and the other guys.

Kami started mentally counting while inhaling, hold, exhaling, and his expression changed from robot to furious.

Emotions made him forget the whole point of the earth experiments that the terran above average breathing got on his nerves for the stock was trying to emulate them. Lord Balem barely audible commands in the Orous language "stop that" while he super humanly fast grabbed its hand, yanked it through the rose bushes snagging its dress ripping in a few places and scratching its shoulders. He forced it to the ground in kneeling position; so fast it-she couldn't react at all.

Seething in anger, Kami glares and tries to get up but he pushes her back down. While still kneeling in front of him, she holds her tongue while figuring out an escape route. Realizing if he's that strong and fast then she’ll have to talk her way out of this situation.

She thought, ‘this crazy snobby cosplayer, does he think he owns the universe. My guard friend did warn me.’ Feeling sadness and hoping her friend still gets to keep his job, Kami self-conscious, her body contradicting her mind, lowers her eyes and apologizes for any imagined infraction as if she was in an SCA event where feudality rules, stating nonchalantly in English in her best European accent, "My lord, I apologize; is there any way to make reparations for my conduct".

Seeing through the stealth cameras connected to his FTL for higher beings ignore the lower ones, Balem saw it-her go through all its feelings for they were exhibited plainly on its face. He was pleased by this display instead of being annoyed as he thought he would be for he despises such sentimentality.

In his life he surrounds himself with androids, races that aren’t sappy, and everyone else controls themselves except for Lady Kalique who pretends to be happy and Mother’s pet, Titus who is a ball of mush who wouldn’t survive if it wasn’t for the deer. Stating into the air just above a whisper "Lord Balem Abrasax First Primary Heir to House Abrasax Cunabulum System Orous,” he thinks ‘Kalique wins for I need to relax to get the best final harvest.’

Kami thought he is either an excellent actor or crazy but that’s a neat name, trying not to sound too excited, “My lord, is it Baalim (Balem) meaning _they_ the powers that be… the old high gods the new ruler of Earth who said it merged with the old ones and tried to make us forget them.”

Lord Balem didn’t stop it from rambling for he was entertained by it, a stock animal thinking it knew him, and wondered if the new ruler it referred to was his Mother. He doesn’t recall all the stock animals knowing such things maybe it’s a defective company drone. Also if it was dangerous his team would have already neutralized it.

“… Abrasax the highest principle, power above all, the creator a destroyer of the world,” she held back saying the ‘king worm of planet Jupiter,’ cunabulum means cradle, and Horus for almost everyone knows about Horus. So she moved on to her name, “My given name means acolyte, young cult officiant, but I haven't decided on an SCA (Society for Creative Anachronisms) name or any one particular universe to cosplay, my lord.”

This time Lord Balem looked down at it wanting to kill it trying to ignore that he didn’t know the information it-she was saying and told himself it must be some silly animal stock entertainment to waste time. Contemplating it, ‘But isn’t that what his sister asked him to do? Wasting time for the pleasure of wasting time was what Ki, his spiritual advisor, and she wanted him to enjoy.’ It tried to get up again and he pushed it back down again.

Lord Balem physically encircled it to judge it with his own eyes. When he was behind it, it tried a feeble attempt at escaping by crawling forward. He let it-her crawl a few steps for his amusement then briskly floated to gently step on one of its-her hands while unconsciously letting out a small smirk laugh.

Looking up at him from the grass, Kami stood still for she wanted to knock him down but she wouldn’t dare remembering her guard friend. She would have enjoyed trying to wrestle him into the ground reminiscing of Nala and Simba from the Lion King movie. Her last boyfriends did not like to wrestle and prefer her to be their version of femininity and she wondered if smirk Lord Abras-ass would like it or be irritated by it. Definitely be irritated for he seems to be a lonely mentally disturbed wealthy adult-child thinking the world revolves around him that his caregivers had to get the whole park for his outing.

Feeling sorry for the unfortunate wealthy adult-child, she decided overestimating her skills that she could help him and by helping him he could help others. In that moment all of her, mind-heart-body, agreed to that decision. Knowing herself she was able to help more unstable and prideful persons.  For her the most prideful and arrogant of all is her mother, Kami with help from her friends had learned to be her own person even as her mother still insists that she is extension of her. In a make believe going to cry tone she said, “What is needed of me, my lord?”

Lord Balem was somewhat satisfied that it almost sounded like the rat-splice on Jupiter playing up its worthlessness to please him. "Up" He commands whispers as he takes his foot off its-her hands.

Kami stared straight into his eyes, still on all four folds its-her hands in prayer and bows its-her head, He thinks but doesn’t tell it-her ‘I’m not going to kill you yet.’ The stock lays its body down lowers bows its head and folds its hands in prayer again. Then it gets on all fours almost touching him to fold its hands in prayer again and bow its-her head. 

Getting on its knees it-she folds hands in prayer and bows again, then stands up to do the same except after folding  its hand in prayers it opens them up as to give. Raising an imaginary tribute to the atmosphere, it then folds its hand into prayer again over its head. Finally it goes back to being on its-her knees with head down and waits for his instructions. [basic salute to the sun yoga steps; hands in prayer, caterpillar, upward facing dog, downward facing dog, forward fold, mountain and back again.]

The moves seem familiar to Lord Balem for they calm him but he can’t quite place where he has seen this before. "Walk with me,” involuntarily came out in an amused tone.

Pointing towards her bag and giggling, Kami requests "may I get my dead cow skin." The former vegan in her would have cringed but now she knows the value of Tyul’pan’s life for that cow lived a great life.  

Moving his hand, Lord Balem grants it-her permission and starts to walk ahead.

They walked through the garden silently as she tried to walk side by side but he keeps speeding up till they were both running and slowly Kami gave up her right to walk as equals, and let him have a few feet ahead of her. Lord Balem sees her give up on the droid cameras attached to his FTL for a second he wore a look of satisfaction.

He says in an entitled superior tone, well compare to his other tones, "Ask. Anything."

Kami thought, ‘Really anything? So the person he's cosplaying naming himself ABRASAX… he does think he's god incarnate, this should at least be entertaining. Shall I ask the question that I already know the answer to? That when I told my parents, my friends, and new friends they laugh at me.’ She tried to make it funny, "Is Earth a big factory chicken coop, humans the chickens, and _THEY_ don't keep us just for the eggs?"

Lord Balem answered, “Yes.”

She was surprise that he didn't laugh at her. Kami was impressed or maybe that he thinks she’s the crazy one, and likes to amuse himself. So she asks another, "Thought forms and other higher density beings feed off our energy, some feed off positive and some feed of negative"

"No,” he replied for that’s ludicrous.

Kami was disappointed. She asked the next one to gauge his reaction, "do the higher beings consume humans err chickens"

Lord Balem turned around to face it-her replying, “Yes,” to see the effect of his answer with his own eyes.

Not fazed for one moment she kept rambling, "hum, humans can’t be compared to chickens since they are fowls so a closer similarity would be cattle since they are mammals too. But chickens are omnivores and cattle are ruminants… so we humans are really greedy pigs." She laughs at her own statement and then asks the favorite question of conspiracy theorists, "Are some of the higher beings reptoids?"

"Yes,” he answers thinking it must be a defective subject of some experiment but why haven’t they disposed of it.

"And are there other types, like birds or amphibians? Are they in competition to rule us?"

"Yes. No," he replied starting to enjoy his distraction from work. He wondered if it was part of the controlled rebel groups. Lord Balem could find out instantly through his FTL yet his sister suggested restraining from using the network to get instant answers and instead take pleasure in life’s simple unknowns figuring out its little puzzles.

**"Ever close your eyes Ever stop and listen. Ever feel alive and you've nothing missing. You don't need a reason Let the day go on and on." Wild Child by Enya**


	12. mistake encounter p2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We're perennials not annuals philosophical ramblings and Balem's amusement of it. Fangirling.

Kami asked about different subjects from electromagnetic fields, the planets being the children of their star, beings on the planets being conduits for the planet, time/space versus space/time and if time was really fourth dimension that can be viewed from fourth as a physical object like a river of time and many questions in which Balem replied in a bored tone, “too complex for this stock’s understanding or that’s nonsense,” even when being interested for his mother discussed some of that nonsense with her favorite beings (friends). 

He stops to lean on a big weeping willow near a pond with a fountain while he stares indignantly at it-her.

Knowing that she is equal to any other being because they are all part of GOD; just as a drop of water is part of the ocean, his snooty attitude doesn't disturb Kami yet she can't help take in this perfect fashion magazine scene in front of her.

As Lord Balem looks up into the tree branches where a Western Meadowlark sings, Kami is happy that she had her phone on vibrate while taking a photo without his knowledge in case she goes missing. Well that's what she tells herself to rationalize the guilty feelings she has when she pushes the button in violation of another person for her viewing pleasure later.

Kami singsong to the bird, "Hey little birdie are you lost?" Then sings its tune for her friends have gotten used to her singing songs of what seems out of nowhere. He doesn't seem to care and looks around as if he is bored.

Now that she’s truly relaxed she gets as closed as she can to adjust her center to his center of gravity and realizes it’s much stronger than any of the other masters, people that claim to be helping humanity, she has felt.  Tilting her head as she gets close enough to almost touch the daemon, "Are you hu...” she feels gravity pull like a magnet, “…Is your entire DNA human?"

"Yes" he breathes out with a small almost nonexistent smirk going over all of Earth’s projects trying to figure out which one it-she belongs to manually.

‘Argh! Confounded hormones!’ She yells at herself internally she feels his breath on her face. Backing away before she does something regrettable, she acknowledges GOD within him (prayer hands, Namaste), remembering that she’ll probably never see him again so she tries to be genuine and in the moment.

As if he was a master, Kami instinctively kneeled back down as the grass tickled her knees and spreading her dress skirt so that it looks pretty.

Glaring at her for a long moment, his demeanor starts to change and he stares instead.  She decided stare back at him with the same intensity.

Her aggravating instincts are overwhelming and it turns into longing, ‘I could gaze at that ancient soul eternally. I yearn to live within those eyes.’ Blasphemy she yells at her mind because she’s starting to resemble her friend Planet or worse those books she likes to despise! She lowered her gaze to study the blades of grass and its inhabitants, the little brown ants and one red ladybug that methodically searches the grass blades for its favorite food.

Lord Balem glares at her for his defenses didn’t stop that electromagnetic pull. He is tempted to use his FTL but is determined not to use it for when he sets his mind to it he succeeds therefore instead tries to use his energy skills. Angry at himself for failing at it miserably for he hasn’t practice since he was twelve. He stares at the object of study trying again, and again, and again…

Kami reflects, ‘I'm not as disciplined as I thought because being in silence with someone I hate, a stranger, love or like is easy, but when confused with what feelings this person brings up in me, it is unnerving. I need a distraction to give the mind something to do while the heart-body-spirit decides, and if I'm going to have an audience I might as well put on a show. Sometimes I'm so full of myself.’ She sings her favorite lines from Loreena Mackennitt's Ride Across the Caucasus:

"There are visions, there are memories  
There are echoes of thundering hooves  
They are watching, they are waiting  
They are witnessing life's mysteries

Ride on, ride on, through the night ride on  
Ride on, ride on, through the night ride on”

Lord Balem relaxed and was finally able to see its-her bioelectricmagnetic field without the use of his FTL implant. The creature before him is benign and what his sister strives to imitate in their public relations campaigns. For many people Kalique soars but in his opinion she falls flat. He ponders if the tenderhearted living thing before him will disappoint, probably.

“Take me with you on this journey  
Where the boundaries of time are now tossed  
In cathedrals of the forest  
In the words of the tongues now lost

Find the answers, ask the questions  
Find the roots of an ancient tree  
Riding o'er the land, you can feel its gentle hand  
Leading on to its destiny

Ride on, ride on…" She stops mid-line to hear the lost meadowlark sing.

Relaxed, Kami closes her eyes attempting to meditate without making the Darth Vader sound. She hardly heard his voice over the birds and rustling water, "My siblings suggested that I socialize and enjoy life. To do something for no reasons other than enjoyment,” she opens her eyes to gaze at him while he continues, “Kalique has a planet-wide botanical garden collection, Titus tests the limits of human physical pleasure.  I live for expanding our ReGenX-E enterprise throughout the universe."  

He waves a hand as if he was bored and stating, "Speak. Freely."

Kami laughs internally because she has been speaking freely this whole entire time, ‘Is he trying to fool himself that he can control me?’ Instead of figuring out how to get away from him or help him, she blames his pheromones for staying and doing so for selfish reasons.

As she keeps eye contact while her mind is going a mile a minute, ‘Such a hypocrite am I, now I won't be able to complain about idiotic things feminine persons do for a masculine one. But he keeps in character so well and I'm curious about his imaginary planet Horus and what does a regenex enterprise entails?’

"I'm a workaholic too! I took off the semester that I may connect with Earth to feel like I belong to this species even when they irritate me by having such short term memories,” Kami says the next whole paragraph without taking a breath yet Lord Balem is able to keep up.

Lord Balem laughing internally over his insider information thought, ‘Good that you are a hard worker. Of course most of the human species on this planet don’t belong here. Yes we gave them short memories on purpose.’

Kira continues, “I'm learning not to be so oversensitive or judgmental by counseling people for it makes me listen to what seemed like petty problems at the beginning but now I’ve learned to empathize more with my fellow humans. Also it has given me the chance to appreciate what life has given me.”

‘Be judgmental of their impractical behaviors for they are animals with higher DNA. I wonder how angry the little fluffy ruminant will be when I tell it I’m responsible for all its irritations. Yes because I let you live,’ he was too distracted to think about work.

“I know what our general purpose is but I'm still figuring out my individual purpose." Kami lets out a sigh, "I may have a love hate relationship with this planet"

‘By Abrasax, this will be interesting for stocks’ general purpose is to breed and it already knows that we consume them,’ Lord Balem was trying not to laugh at the absurd idea that it thought its purpose was something other than breeding.

With joy she states, "At least you know what makes you fulfilled!" Kami knows better than to give advice when none is asked but her inborn instincts of being over helpful wins, "I suggest slowly doing different things you don't normally do, increasing a few minutes a day till you have a whole day and from a day keep increasing till you have a weeks' vacation. What we did today walking through nature or painting, singing, exercising, and even crying when no one is listening. The most helpful is calling a stranger to listen to our ranting while they mirror and accept our emotions."

‘Oh! It’s a bad clone of Ki (his spiritual advisor). It will be humorous to see her irritated by taking this one home for I have never seen Ki angry,’ Lord Balem pictured it in his mind.

Playing along with his ego, she looks down, "I dislike saying this, it's really a pet peeve of mine, but with you I don't know. May I ask open ended questions that aren't just yes or no answers? …My lord."

"Ask any question"

"Where is Horus and what is the significance of that planet?"

"Orous is the original homeworld"

‘Eh, he's is wearing a fine tailored costume but has no background story, maybe the business aspect of it is more fleshed out, since he says  _he lives for his company_.’ "What does a regenex enterprise entail and what is needed to manage one?" Kami peers up at him and ends up staring.

With precise fluid movements he stands, closes the distance between them so that he is towering over her that she must tilt her head up to see his face. He replies in a pandering low tone, "Growing and processing homo-sapiens hybrids to extend time for Homo-Sapien-Sapiens"

Still looking up and she comes a little closer almost touching noses, still kneeling, to ask as if talking about plants, “how do THEY choose who to harvest and when?"

But before he could answer, there was a low almost inaudible beep.  She wondered if it was one of his intricate bracelets but before she could figure it out, a big holographic video screen appeared above her between him and her. She thought it was a guy in a reptoid suit speaking a foreign language. Staring in amusement at the screen she thinks, ‘Wow the guy in the reptile suit has dragon like wings, they are delightful, and he twitches them when he's nervous. Neat costume! Richy rich must be modern Walt Disney with his world building.’ There are androids and other creatures in the background too.

His FTL has been malfunctioning lately so he uses other resources to give it a rest before upgrading only what’s necessary. In Orous Lord Balem speaks commands in an angry hoarse tone and cuts the communication off. He then turns to it-her with a maniacal grin to say, " _All_ of them; once a planet has reached the maximum capacity."

Kami’s face constructs in fear for a few moments then she distracts herself with the grass in front of her knees. Trying to calm herself, she pretends that the wolf is still grandma, that this is an emo depressed misunderstood powerful regular person. Breathe, just breathe. Meeting his eyes with courage she says, "That doesn't seem efficient… I would think mammals would be a perennial, seed once and harvest numerous times, and not an annual crop were it has to be reseeded every time?" His face comes close enough that one more millimeter they would touch but he’s still with that robot mask so she keeps talking, "Like fruit trees in which you only harvest the ripe fruit and leave the others to mature."

Kami feels unnerved by how he bores into her with those ancient eyes that do not match his face.

Lord Balem, saying it in an undertone command, "I will ask the questions.  Answer them."

Instead of getting angry at his tone, she gets lost counting the colors in his eyes that she almost missed his murmur "General purpose?"

Hesitating and trying to think of the simplest way to answer such a complex question, she answers, "To grow, to know, teach-learn. As RA said 'an expression of gravity is light is knowledge is love.  A _person's DNA determines their fate or maximum growth it that life time._  The key to understanding our past and our future is Epigenetics.  Our holy books have many truths and half-truths of offspring paying for the mistakes of the parents. Everything, in the environment both emotional and physical gets recorded in our gene expressions to pass on to the next generation. We are three-minded-machines that need to be tuned to find objective reality."

He bore a true smile on his face,  _"ah, gurdjieff"_

A joy overfilled Kami; finally someone, who she’s attracted to, understands the same things she does, "Yes, I love his theories! My favorite of his stories is "the evil magician's sheep", Beelzebub's tales, but the hardest book to read was "in search of the miraculous" by one of his disciples. He says that we will never have control until we have control of ourselves by knowing-loving ourselves. Have you read any of his works?"

Still smiling he says, "I am acquainted with it (that terran)"and asks "individual purpose?"

Confused by his answer and now busy gathering her thoughts, Kami forgets the significance of it. "My individual purpose…" she says buying more time. Should she bear her soul to a total stranger, one that hints of danger, but gives the impression of understanding her?

_"I want to know what is true reality even if it's horrible, to help ease the pain and suffering in all of us, **to give my life to the greater good and show that everyone is worthy of love just because they are. It isn't what we do or don't do.**  Just breathing and being is enough. There has to be win-win scenarios that we just haven't found._

‘No prey wants to know when it will get eaten. Yes, It isn’t what we do but who we are; for what we do reflects who we are,’ Lord Balem repeats his mother’s line.

_“I think I would start with epigenetics in teaching mothers and fathers how to respect new human beings. Showing them that children are their own persons and must be shown respect. Showing them that it's ok to have feelings without explaining or defending them, that they are responsible only for their own and can't control others feelings.”_

‘Yes to epigenetics the rest is absurd as offspring are the property of their creator (female beings) and their creator’s owner,’ he tells himself more of mother’s lines.

_"Pottenger's cats" is the best example showing it takes 4 generations to fix and 6 to keep the changes." He's still listening to all her ramblings and doesn't seem displeased. She excitedly keeps on ranting, "Oh! The Agouti Mice experiments are the best indicators of how we can easily fix gene expressions. Just by changing diet these experiments show that diabetic inflamed moms can pass on correct non-diabetic gene expressions to their offspring."_

‘Close enough… and somebody must have lost their peculiar testing subject for even the noble classes think those facts are bizarre refusing to believe them,’ he amuses himself with its-her tirade.

_Raising her voice she impassionedly says "It makes me ill that a diseased selfish individual chooses to have offspring fully knowing the suffering they will put their children through. There's a reason nature says NO! There isn't an EXCUSE anymore the information is here for everyone to read and see; it isn't hidden anymore. Why care more about plant and animal genetics when our own is horribly messed up?"_

Laughing internally, ‘It’s angry at the wrong beings. How can anyone be mad at a canine for doing what canines do? There are many reasons for that the most important is forcing specific mutations and absolute control,’ he wants to use his FTL to ask Earth’s A.I. for the specific project but then decides he doesn’t need it for its system seems to be in optimal running condition.

_Her knees are starting to hurt but she doesn’t care. Kami was uncertain at first if he was making fun of her. Now she realizes he is actually listening and looks up to find him sincerely smiling or what can be called a smile in him. All the other intellectual people she has tried to discuss that subject have become angry and distant from her._

_She thought ‘If only I could make him laugh.’ She doesn’t care if she’s blushing while her voice falters to say, "Please Lord Balem, correct this lowly earthworm, I like to discuss those ideas with you that I may grow in understanding. I want to hear your views, and recommended actions I can take to reach my highest potential… for eternity." She loves feedback from everyone but most people don't want to discuss the meaning of life nor how to improve themselves. Sometimes Kami thinks it's on purpose that they don't want to see their real selves._

Lord Balem thought ‘This worm of Jupiter the creator of this world will have mercy upon the lowly earthworm. For this one will rile the high ones ire breaking their masks’ and in a what he thought was a sweet tone came out spooky one, "What are the mating rituals for this particular region?"

"What?" Kami said out loud. ‘Did he just ask me out? Do I want to know him? Yes, I want to know the real him not just his make-believe part.’ Confused and flustered she answered, "well just like most regions, the bird males show that they have the best genes by being the most colorful and the best nest builders for the females to inspect and choose."

Balem didn’t say anything giving it-her a chance to figure it out.

Contemplating whether he would be a good partner but she doesn’t have enough information to make a decision, Kami tries to relax. Feeling a twinge in her chest, she wants to let go of all the rules… ‘I think… I think I'm in lust because to love is to know and I don't know him at all.’ He’s still staring and she dislikes that her feelings show on her face. ‘Why can't I be like him or like my parents?’

"Are you having a terran short term memory episode?” Balem was disappointed and involuntarily let out a sigh. “Kalique's garden suggestion didn't work…" he said getting so close that she feels his breath on her face again, as his words trailed off.

He kissed her forehead and walked to the nearest bench. Kami knew that it was a deliberately calculated move and she hate it that it worked. He barely sat on the bench, his legs spread apart taking most of the space, and calls her with a hand motion. Points to the grassy ground in front of him "Kneel"

‘Come here little animal… don’t think. Come to your owner,’ Lord Balem was trying to be patient for everyone instantly follows his orders.

Instead of moving, she replies in monotone "An abstract question deserves an abstract answer, my lord." She strives not to think for her mind screams no while her mind thinks the rest of her is content. Her heart-body has never been as happy as it switches to autopilot as if it had a mind of its own.

‘It wasn’t abstract… now I’m arguing in my mind with an _animal_. Doesn’t matter for I’m about to act like one,’ his patience was running out and was about to get his team to drag it-her to him.

Peering into his eyes, she hesitantly gets up to go kneel where he pointed, in front of him. She can't tell what is real anymore. The sun is starting to set. Kami looks down to the grass as a few tears fall from her eyes.

She’s afraid and doesn’t know if it's him she’s afraid of or her own feelings.  Kami doesn’t know if she can say no to him and doesn’t know if she wants to say no.

Lord Balem hears its-her heart pounding in his mind in unison with his and he finds it odd that it should be afraid and beating frantically.

Kami glances up into his eyes hardly muttering the words "Lord Balem may I say…" before she can say the word no, he grabs the back of her head. Opening his mouth wide and surrounding her lips with his lips, enveloping her entire mouth with such totality that she can't speak or shout for help. He shoves his tongue deep into the crevices of her mouth taking her out of her trance as she giggles thinking, ‘yes I still have my tonsils, Balem,’ wishing she could know his real name.

Lord Balem has kissed two high Entitled heirs, smarty little splice assistant of Titus, and his half-sister but none of it felt like this. Its-her body was oscillating and vibrating in unison with his. He didn’t want its-her lips but to rip that heart that felt as if it was drawing his body onto it yet it was exhilarating for he couldn’t breathe.   

He said he was human yet she can't understand how his tongue could be long enough to penetrate her throat. Shocked, as she felt everything and yet nothing, he literally took her breath away. Electricity was coursing through every cell of her body and for the first time in her life her mind went blank.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is FICTION. I love Stephen Hawkings. I'm pro-life, universal education, childcare, healthcare, food stamps & welfare, not a pro-birther who scowls at poor working single mothers and defunds gov't assistance that take care of children that could have been prevented with gov't funded FREE Birth Control! Also if eugenics, white supremacy religious extremist racists population control, were in effect I would be dead! 
> 
> Epigenetics Begin Before Birth: How gene expression works  
> http://www.beginbeforebirth.org/the-science/epigenetics
> 
> Bioelectrography or Kirlian photography (some people can view energy fields with their own eyes)


	13. The Garden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> why Balem is playing with a stock human and a breakdown or two

**"There's no time for us, there's no place for us. Who wants to live forever? There's no chance for us, it's all decided for us… Who dares to love forever? Oh Oh… When LOVE MUST DIE! … WHO IS FOREVER anyway?" Who wants to live forever by Queen**

‘Will the feelings away,’ I the First Primary of House Abrasax the CEO of The Universe keep repeating mother’s advice. I do not understand how can the other Entitleds think this is entertaining or why anyone else would?

 **The awkwardness** of yelling NO and slapping an Entitled’s hand when I was young even after mother gave them permission to touch me, **the elation** of finally being able to visit other planets, **the desperation of not knowing** what to do to make mother happy… Trying to desperately separate from my intense feelings, by mistake as I used to do so when I was young I took in _her-its_ thoughts and feelings.

 _Its_ thoughts as _it_ was awestruck, ‘I am all. I am nothing. ALL Nothing at once. Wanting to merge as one, I'm the oxygen and he's hydrogen2. Yes, for now, he's at a higher level than me, I intuitively know this.’ How comical for the stock animal to think _it_ could reach our level in this lifetime.

Thinking I tasted oddly familiar, and yet different from anything else _it_ ever had… _It_ is humorous that _it_ dared to compare me with anything on this primitive planet.

I despised taking on the surrounding environment’s feelings involuntarily. Mother changed all my servants to be androids when she found out and always disengaged from her feelings when near me until the high priestess were able to nullify that seventh sense. Its back.

Moving forward off the bench to crouch on my heels remembering what females fancy I tangle my hand in _its_ hair pulling us closer and I matched my lips to hers again. _It_ giggled again before matching my breathing. Uncertain of whether I was impressed or annoyed by _its_ breathing matching mine, I let go of _its_ lips to stare at _it_.

 _It_ crosses the line by slowly reaching out to touch my hair. Stopping myself from yanking _its_ hands off me as it felt strange to be touched as no one not even the android assistants dared, I tolerated _its_ touch. Still cupping _its_ head, I kiss _it_ adamantly for my own satisfaction.

Opening _its_ eyes, I felt _its_ guilt for what I do not know. Ah there, _it_ is adorable trying to bind me _it_ cannot for I am no ordinary human. The atmosphere starts to show the true face of the verse as my current location rotates away from the main star. The gardens’ ambient lights start to flicker shocking _it_ and making _it_ confused. These types of lights usually hypnotize the stock so _its_ reaction was unusual.

While _it_ is still on _its_ knees below me, _It-she_ started to cry closing _its_ eyes trying to move back. In precise calculated moves, I used _its_ own movement to push _it-her_ backwards and let go of _its_ head to gently fall onto the grass leaving no space between us.

I have _it_ pin down yet I’m confused as to why _it_ feels pity for me while I try to drown _her_ with my tongue. Why is _it_ not scared? Holding _its_ hands over _its_ head while _she-it_ lets me push _its_ legs apart as _its_ legs straddle around me so that our navels line up, the seat of our connection to the source, I psychically  pull on _her-its_ core trying to drain _it_ but _it_ did not as _it_ knows how exchange and grow energy.

All my centers oscillated pulling on _its_ core. This stock human animal is remarkable being a new homo-sapien with fully formed centers when our own homo-sapien-sapiens beings take centuries to grow theirs. Invigorated as our electromagnetic fields start pulsing as one, I lose track of time.

Time the most precious resource stopped existing for a moment. Instead of being scared I was content. When the trance broke all the feelings I failed to will away come back. I thought this would have erased it, or at least numb the pain, but I was wrong the memories still hurt. Opening my eyes, I let go of _its_ lips and _it_ looks at me with concern. My face is wet, was I crying? And I am shaken by the realization that I am on Earth.

How much I hate this planet and how she used to tease me. I am not special. She teased all of us, giving kisses on our lips since we where babes and still in adulthood; knowing exactly what she was doing. Still in awe of her power over everyone and everything, mother how much I longed for your touch yet you denied it. Reviewing my life Kalique tried to explain the meaning of friends. Now I realize the only social interactions were for gaining ReGenX-E customers.

Mother all you ever wanted me to do was work because EVERYONE in the universe is depending on us. Not to waste my time on trivial things. Reminding me every day that I was made especially for you to run the company and to be the caregiver of the universe; you where proud of my DNA and its expressions, so much that it is etched on the wall of Ouroboros, our main refinery.

Did you really love me? And I blame Kalique as I involuntarily ask myself if love you even when reviewing all those beautiful atrocious memories? This creature before me isn't you, _it_ doesn't even look like you, yet _it_ brings up all these confusing feelings within me. NO _this_ isn't my Mother… but better because _SHE_ is… _IT_ IS MINE! All of it is mine to do as I please. This planet is mine, everything on it its mine. The UNIVERSE IS MINE!

Crying I let go of _its_ hands, I slid my hands between the ground and _it_ cupping _its_ head in my hands, and prop _it_ on my lap keeping the regenerative center connected. _It_ gave that look of worry that Mother used to give me right after she thought she went too far. Then _It_ smiles saying, "Lord Balem, are you an illusion or a real illusion? May I touch the cuff bracelet on your hand?"

Ignoring the first silly question, I give _it_ my hand.

 _It_ plays with my old Holo-Band hand cuffs, first touching its ridges, then by twisting it around my wrist, till _it_ sees my seal, a blue animated Orous with my sigil confirming 'official original DNA' and not a clone.  I chastise myself for forgetting to turn it off after sealing a document for a worker culling. "Is that Horus? My lord," _it-she_ says.

"Yes, it is Orous; O-r-o-u-s not Horus, the Earth Sol sky god," I replied to _it_ pretending _it_ was a little Kalique who needed many words to understand the information.

"Is it Greek for Mountain, like Mountain Olympus? My lord?" _It_ guessed.

"Not quite but that is the closes terran translation," I answered pondering how mother was able to talk to the stock as if they were our equals and then nonchalantly watch a harvest.

"Lord Balem, may I kiss your right hand?" _It_ asked nervously yet kindheartedly while it held my right hand by the cuff.

I breathed out feeling uncomfortable yet still I consented by whispering, "Yes."

 _She-it_ gently moved _her-its_ hand from my cuff touching the palm of my hand with _its_ fingers while _its_ thumb gently rubbed the top of my hand before _she-it_ brought my hand to _its-her_ lips.

 _It_ asked to kiss my left hand. Blinking my eyes once slowly and a small nod giving my permission, I forget that _it_ does not understand. Giving _it_ my left hand, _it_ repeated the movements on my head but harder as I still felt as its hand was on my right.

I was lost in the sensation that when _it_ asked me, "May I kiss your forehead, my lord?"

Somewhat remembering to verbalize to the stock human I said, “Yes,” while still in a trance.

 _It_ brushes _its_ lips on my forehead and for a moment I feel safe. Sweetly _it_ asks, "May I kiss your nose, my lord?"

I say "Yes," without realizing what I agreed to.   _It_ gives me a light kiss on the nose and a laugh escapes my lips at the ridiculousness.

 _It_ laughs with me and asks "May I kiss your left ear, my lord?"

It reminds me of fond childhood memories as I let _it_ do as _it_ wishes seeing how far _it_ will go, "Yes, both."

 _It_ says "Left, my lord." before _it_ slowly moved and used _her-its_ tongue to flick my left ear and then slowly facing me again _it_ says "Right, my lord." before flicking my right ear. _It_ is hilarious to me for I imagine the preposterous image of mother asking me when she inspected every inch of my perfect body for spots.

After a quick intake of breath _it_ asks, "My lord, may I kiss your left cheek?"

I say yes to both cheeks. Seeing her-it lick its upper lip and then its lower lip, I wanted to grab its tongue to know how it would feel on my fingertips instead I held on harder to its lumbar area (small of her back).

 _It_ croons, “Left, my lord.” The sound _its_ wet lips made as they depart my left cheek lulls me into a feeling of safety. And by the time they leave my right cheek, I say "May I kiss…" before I realize what I'm doing.

Overjoyed _it_ says "Yes, my lord." _It_ is overjoyed because I felt joy through _its_ center.

I brushed my lips to _hers_ and _She_ … _it_ eagerly received and accepted my lips; we experienced a pleasure better than any of the others in this long series of oral unions. Everything I did _It_ … _She_ copied. Breathing in conjunction with each other; _its-her_ cardiovascular system slowed down closer to my own. We press our foreheads together and looking into each other's eyes I asked "again…" _She_ _it_ said "yes, my lord." and again experienced the same elation.

“Balem, when alone,” I corrected and then asked "deeper?" and _it-she_ pressed _her_ lips against mine. The same physical moves as the first time I kissed _her_ but this time it felt extremely different because we where breathing in unison and _she_ was opening wider and accepting me. Looking into _her-its_ eyes I was shocked to find what looked like a new individual soul forming and annoyed at myself for thinking about work, I trailed kisses down to _Its-her_ neck and hovered just above the skin, whispering "may I mark you as mine?" for I wanted to try it all.

"Yes, Balem," _It-she_ said passionately. Parting my lips slightly, I placed them on _Its-her_ neck making a good seal not letting any air escape. "Balem" she announced tenderly as I sucked just hard enough to break the capillaries on my chosen spot but if I wanted to I could kill _it_ and break _its-her_ neck in one precise bite.

Gently kissing my mark on _her_ , _she_ asked me if Balem Abrasax is my real name. I laughed telling _her_ "silly United States terrans thinking their naming convention is above all others." And she blushed. "Abrasax made them that way, letting the pigs in the farm think that they are the highest and best above all others" I give a mischievous laugh.

In almost monotone voice _she_ stated, "They would have a better nutritional profile if you let them roam free in pastures, let them have a life just as if they were in the wild plowing the fields and airing the soil that even an old breeder sow will taste better than any factory young pig.”

I automatically replied, “As the most compassionate and ethical company in the universe Abrasax Industries has a perfect record,” then chastise myself for letting _the_ _stock_ control the conversation.

 Sigh, _she_ continued, “… This will lower feeding costs, lower fuel costs, lower guardian interaction, no over vaccinating, and no over medicating while increasing profits and the pigs will be happier. It's win-win for everyone including the environment."

Amused I replied "I was trying to be funny like mother’s pet (Titus) and I marked _my sheep_ not a pig"

 _She-it_ thought I was joking and laughing said "Balem, I rather be a lioness. A lioness that only takes what is needed to keep the environment in check.”

"Sheep!" I said waiting for _its_ reaction.

She-it huffed, “I'm an efficient carnivore! Humans are efficient carnivores but can SURVIVE not thrive as omnivores. I have the scientific data to back that statement up. Also, predators don't stop to think 'oh this kitten, chicken, pig is a vegetarian, I'm not going to eat it!'"

I was amused by its declarations and replied, "A sheep that wants to be a lion." I laughed but then I remember Earth is different than the others, "the hybrid lions think they are only sheep and some think they are human…”

Distracted for _it_ stuck _its_ tongue out at me and I wanted to grab it but _she-it_ hid it back into her mouth. I continued, “…we have all of eternity to talk about work but for now, my sheep shall be name 'Ki'Ra' by combining Ki the goddess that provides everything that the plants and animals need to grow and my sheep's favorite Ra representative star god."

Happily _it_ accepted _its_ new name and stated how glad _she_ was that I chose it, "Greek Kyrios meaning lord. Thank you for my name in your fandom and SCA name!"

My old Holo-Band, my FTL systems are being defragmented, alerted me to a security call update. I hold my doll close to me, her head on my chest, she breathes in unison with me. I surprised myself, I don't want to answer, but it is time sensitive and I must accept it.

Knowing this time that with our joint military campaign, Kalique's and my forces will finally carry out Mother's last wishes, to eradicate the old disciples, I see an end to this rebellion. They refuse to acknowledge Mother's last orders, they want to keep the old ways and cannot let go of how Mother used to be.

My advisors suggest keeping the highest level ones that I may interrogate and integrate onto Ouroboros, Earth's experiments, and "that planet," Kalique and I share this security responsibility, yet another concerning situation that Mother left for us to fix. I must go, however having entertainment waiting for me on Earth, makes it less agonizing to come back.

While my doll's face is still covered by my chest, I scan the back of her neck with my Holo-Band hopeful that she was born in a hospital and has an identification chip. When I see the breeding pair, I'm fuming that two of our non-breeding workers, a Biotechnology Engineer and an Electron Microscopy Analyst, have gone against company policy.

I turn the screen off. I do not understand, both male and female worker drones had their reproductive tubes tied and they go for check-ins. I know Earth's main A.I. is in dire need of an upgrade but this is just ridiculous. How can I eliminate that one point zero seven percent chance of this happening again? Do I need to take their entire uterus out and have them take hormone replacement shots? Arghhh… seething for I do not need another "that planet!"

I want to rip _its_ throat… _She_ puts one hand on the center of my chest and the other matching on my back; they have tingly warmness to them and start to give off a calming heat. Feeling _her_ eyes upon me, I look at my toy crossly. My doll soothingly states "I still like you when you are angry. It's ok to be angry. It has taken me a long time to learn how to express my angry feelings appropriately and I'm still learning." Gently takes my hands into _her_ hands and tenderly says "Balem I'm here, how can I assist?"

Is that so, let us test that theory, with intensity I say, "I want to taste… to see blood flow"

My Kira blushed, moves her hair away from her neck to present it to me. "Please leave enough that I may recover. I need to purr, stimulate the vagus nerve, to relax."

There is a twinge in my chest that I cannnot explain. My heart begins to pulse faster. She starts making that obnoxious non-terran breathing noise. _She_ breathes my name out "Balem". Seeing _her_ carotid vein pulse, I instinctively bite into it drawing out _her_ life.

**\- warning non-cable TV like CW below, it's important but you may skip to next bold lines -** **  
**(Both to each other "Through this [universe] I've stumbled, so many times betrayed trying to find an honest word to find the truth enslaved... and I would be the one to hold you down, kisses so hard, I'll take your breath away after I wiped your tears. Another day of knowing of the path I fear to tread. I follow without pride, nothing stands between us here and I won't be denied". Possession by Sarah McLachlan)****

Mother augmented breast milk with her blood, so I loved blood since I was born; it is the perfect food source with its life giving properties. And before we were able to refine the entire animal into ReGenX-E, our ancestors used to take baths in same day harvested warm blood.

Today those who own planets and are able to afford the free time, still chase their own prey down on foot for sport, like predators (lion pride) hunting down and keeping in check the ruminant (zebra) population.

I hated that mother wouldn't let me participate; it wasn't fair that Kalique and mother’s pet (Titus) were allowed to do whatever they wanted. She said I was above that and that it was for my own good since it is more addictive than ReGenX-E.

I felt my Kira’s heart start beating frantically in fear, yet she held and pressed my head to keep me on her throat. And I felt it, wanted it. I wanted that heart, her blood to keep spilling out against my waiting lips. Mmm I need her… I… It felt so wrong, so hard thinking about it, wanting it. Needing it. Needing hers. Yet the euphoria it brings, keeps me there. Is it the actual act or because it is forbidden?

Pulling my Kira's hand from my hair to lift my head, I see her face flushed and relaxed. How could anyone enjoy that? Enjoy being prey. A crimson river running down her throat and onto her dress, she smiles at me. She kisses her blood off me and sucks on my bottom lip.

No, I'm in charge and take over by biting down on her bottom lip, drawing blood and I sucked on it then licking my tongue against my second mark. I let go of her, watching with intense interest as she feels my bite on her bottom lip with her own tongue, sliding it so lazily. I laughed, licking her life force off my lips as I watched. Then I ask, "Why?"

"Because somehow I trust you and **'Purity leads to fearlessness. It is not the absence of fear but it is the courage to face the fear and experience it completely. If we can truly enter into the space of fear and experience it with the power of purity, it can never affect us again.' from a Reiki Master.”**

**I stare in awe at her as I hear mother’s words, ‘Fears faced disappear,’ in my Kira’s wordy statement.**

My Kira continues, “In other words, I used to be afraid of drowning in water, so I asked one of my friends to watch over me as I let air out of my lungs in a pool of water till I was comfortable with my fear. Also, she and another friend watched over me while I let the ocean waves wash over me and then drag me. I still fear it but now I know I can face those fears."

She laughs out "I like the sound of my own voice, that's what my friends say." Gazes at me to sincerely ask, "Balem, what are your fears? Only if you want to... I want to hear your thoughts for I like the sound of your voice better."

Uh-uh I feel as though she is attacking me with her words. No, I cannot... I'll make something up. I turn away from her and say, "Not having enough time to complete all the tasks ahead of me and not being able to trust another to do their part. Everyone is always disappointing me."

"Balem, may I listen to your heart?" she sweetly says changing the subject for I think it-she knows I said a half-truth.

"Yes, My doll" [ugh Orous explanative!] I said that out loud! Letting her listen for a few moments, I tangle my hand in her hair. Then I restart my ministration to stop the questions. Pushing her on to the grass, I lie on top to taste her blood and then lapping it away from my primitive territorial mark. I stop stare at it (my mark). It's looking pretty, purple with an oval of red teeth marks on top.

Oh by Abrasax! Have I have become the animal Mother warned me about? Will I turn into Titus living only for pleasure? I do not care anymore. I bite her harder. She began that breathing thing she calls purring and breathing heavily says my name. "Balem, I adore you." NOooo, why did you have to go and do that? Arghhh this is what happens for playing with food!

I grab the grass to keep from hitting _it_ and lock my eyes on _it_. Then _it_ has the tenacity to give me a mischievous smile and then smirks at me. _It_ smirk! _Its_ blood spilling onto the ground and _it_ is smirking AT ME! _It_ closes _its_ eyes and becomes still.

Concerned I check, _its_ heart beating steadily yet I do not hear _it_ breathing. No breathing for past a minute, two, three, I start to panic… Crying SHE left me, MOTHER IS DEAD! She got what SHE WANTED without caring about anyone else but herself. What about ME! So ironic that the highest Entitled has no rights. HAD NO RIGHTS! Weeping, "Wakeup! Stop playing. with ME!"

I call on medical. Four of nine of My Inner Circle Security turn off their hyper-shields. I pick my _precious_ up and push _her_ onto my medical officer, in my home-world tongue I screech "FIX HER!" The medical officer, a female jaguar splice, undoes the last bite mark, and keeps telling me that _she_ is ok. I hear _her_ breathe again. Pulling _her_ eyelids open I yell, "Don't. YOU. EVER. do that again!" I grab _it_ from Tael. _It_ is fascinated by my CMO and I ask _it-her_ "Would you like to touch Tael?"

My Kira says enthusiastically, "Yes, my lord. If Tael is ok with that?"

Agitated I say, "Tael does what I WANT!"

She looks at Tael’s feline eyes and asks, "May I touch your ears?"

I scuff at such an absurd request and give Tael the-you-better-kneel-now look. And the Jaguar kneels and moves her head towards my favorite terran to make it easy for _her_ to touch the feline's ears. She touches both ears at the same time and gently scratches behind them making Tael purr.

Delightedly she exclaims "I wish I could purr like you."

"No. you. don't!" I state. And _she_ laughs at me. In my dialect I command Tael for a temporary Holo-Band that sticks to a beings head, the size of a military dog ID tag that connects to Earth's main A.I. and checks the system of any being. As soon as my CMO gives it to me I try to attach it to _my kira_ but _she_ is having none of it.

"Tell me what it is first!" she cries out.

"A medical monitoring device," I say part of the truth.

"Ok" she yields. Calling a screen up so _she_ can see _her_ brain scan, I distracted _her_. I kiss her forehead and say, "Shhh my pet," while I slowly, electrically send her to dreamland. I wipe her memory from now till when I ask her 'why she let me treat her like prey?'

While _my treasure_ sleeps in my arms, I discuss with My Earth Inner Circle Security what would their advice be for keeping _her_ safe without a cage. I know how irrational human stock can behave yet I want _it-her_ to always choose me.

My Earth ICS team was born and trained on Earth right after Mother decided to leave me. They only need to concern themselves with Earth problems but they do know of Kalique and Titus.

They are the closes team I can even consider trusting and I do trust their opinions because they have a 98% track record of achieving the best outcomes. Feeling vulnerable, I may have to promote the rest to travel with me.

Tael volunteers to be my Kira's bodyguard but I insist on three females: It, Sothis a canine splice, and Neith a saragon (reptile bird hybrid). Dealing with "that planet" is enough; I cannot be distracted by my pet.

While the three best warriors are always hidden, my other two ICS members bring me blankets and some enhanced liquid. Yes, terrans stock humans need more substance than us higher beings. I laugh internally at myself. I take care of entire planetary systems but fail at taking care of one being.

My pet covered in blood I spilled is still beautiful to behold but for her comfort I want a change of clothes, yet Tael suggests that most terrans would not be appreciative, instead be angry, and feel like it is a violation of their space. It seems absurd.

I lay my head on my preferred terran listening to her breathe, my body longs for more while this emptiness exists but per Sothis advice I control myself till she wakes up. Making new memories to replace the old ones, Earth will change from being the object of my torment to my joy and my pleasure. As the cycle ends, Earth's new rotation has started; the atmosphere seems to glow in daybreak hues with Sol's light starting to dissipate the darkness. I impatiently wait for her to awaken.

**"Laying close to you Feeling your heart beating And I'm wondering what you're dreaming, Wondering if it's me you're seeing? And I just want to stay with you In this moment forever, forever and ever!" Don't wanna miss a thing by Areosmith**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There’s a reason for the It-She. It shows Balem's confusion. An example for what's happening to him for us to understand would be; going to a CAFO factory farm (Confined Animal Feeding Operations) and falling in love with a pig that's going to be butchered for bacon or used as a breeder. Ridiculous isn't. You wouldn't marry a factory pig?
> 
> I cut a lot of MA stuff. [not bringing it back] There are specific reasons why she lets him get away with $#*+ , other behavior modification techniques you can probably spot, but that last one was just selfish, she knows he's unstable. It was mean because her intention was for payback and not for him to learn to stop pretending he's in control.
> 
> As always you can comment on my atrocious spelling and grammar anytime. Thanks for reading my goobly-goop.


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